Bless the Broken Road
by kiaxoxo
Summary: Have you ever read a story where there is a villain and a victim? Where you think the villain is a black soul and you cry for the victim? Then things are revealed - life altering things? Then the victim is the horribly evil villain? That's my life now.
1. Prologue

**BLESS THE BROKEN ROAD**

**Hello and welcome to my new story!**

**IF YOU HAVE NOT READ 'BEFORE HE CHEATS' _STOP NOW!_**

**It's a one-shot, so it won't take too long to read, but it will help make the world make more sense.**

**Bless the Broken Road (BTBR) is a continuation of my first story: Before He Cheats.**

**STOP NOW IF YOU HAVEN'T READ IT!**

**Summary: **Bella is just fine without Jacob in her life, but he's not so sure about that. After getting dumped by Sarah (a.k.a Bleached Blond Tramp) Jacob is desperately trying to get Bella back and make her believe that he's changed. That ain't working out so great. She keeps telling him 'no' and getting revenge through her songs for the ever popular Golden Eyes. Meanwhile… Edward is secretly in love with Bella. Rosalie and Alice find out and try to hook them up. Will Bella fall for Edward or will she get sucked back in a relationship with Jacob?

OOC, AH

**You could call this story a musical on virtual paper. In musicals, people break out song without any rehearsal or prep or discernable music source. Yes, people will break into song without any rehearsal in this story (not an entire chorus of townspeople though). So I don't want to see any questions saying 'how were they able to sing along or play instruments to that spontaneous song that no one knows?' It's just how musicals work. The only difference here is that you are reading it instead of watching it.**

**I separated this story into 'albums'. Each album is a different emotional period in Bella's life. I will let you know when a new album starts. There will be at least one song in each chapter. 98% of these are country. Don't let your feelings for country music determine if you're going to read this story. You don't have listen to the songs, just read the lyrics. I do ask that you actually read the lyrics, don't skip over them, they are important parts of the story. I will post links to as many songs as possible on my profile and tell you the title and artist of each song.**

**My goal is to get someone hooked on at least one new artist and write you guys an awesome story. :D **

**ENJOY!**

Prologue

I would compare my life so far to a roller coaster ride.

Not necessarily the usual analogy of an emotional roller coaster -although that's defiantly part of it- but the literal sense of it. Riding the roller coaster, the actual layout of a roller coaster, the feelings you get during each part.

In the beginning, when you are waiting in line to get on, you're excited and rearing to go. It starts out with twists and turns. Little bumps and hills along the way, working your way up to that giant mountain in the tracks, the climax of the ride.

Then you finally get to that rise. Your stomach is full of butterflies, you're excited and absolutely terrified. Finally, you reach that pinnacle moment of your journey. The top of the very highest peak along the tracks. You are so relieved that you made up in one piece, and you're ready to continue on with the ride.

The cars go over that little bend at the top, and you're soaring. Screaming with excitement at the top of your lungs. You never want it to end. You have a wonderful sensation dancing in your stomach that you don't ever want to leave behind. It's the time of your life.

But getting to the end of the ride, that's the catch. You are going down. Down to the end. Down. You can see the end, you know it's coming and you can't stop it. You're filled with sadness as it draws nearer and nearer. You don't want to let that exhilarating feeling go. But you know you have to.

The car hit's the flattening tracks and eventually comes to a stop. That euphoric feeling you once had is gone. That rush of the memory is still there, but it is behind you. Instead you're filled with sorrow. Sorrow that it's over and done with. Sure, some people can just grab another ticket and jump right back in line. But some people can't.

For some people -for me- the ride is just… done.

**What did you think? I was so proud of myself when i came up with that :) I hope you liked it too.**

**I will hopefully have the first chapter up soon. I promise i wont be mean and make you guys give me a certain amount of reviews before i put the next one up.**

**Well, i cant think of anything else i want to tell you guys... so until next time!**

**peace, love, and Twilight...**

**Katie**


	2. Giddy On Up

**We start out in the beginning of October. Before He Cheats took place five days ago, Saturday, now it's Wednesday. Remember, everyone is a senior.**

**When I say that they are performing at a club, let's assume that they are all all-ages clubs. We are going for a more appropriate place that highschoolers can perform at.**

**Voice font (this is the font for when they are singing): **_Bella_** … Alice and Rosalie **

**Album: Dear Jacob…  
><strong>**Track #1: Giddy On Up**

Giddy On Up

_**Wednesday, October 6...**_

_Don't forget, don't forget, don't forget._ I mentally chanted as I raced down the hallways to get to biology. I had to get the lyrics that were spinning through my head on paper before I lost them. The moment I got to my desk, I threw my bag on the table, sat on the uncomfortable plastic stool and dug out my song journal and grabbed the first pen I touched. Opening to a clean page, I let the words flow from my pen and onto the paper.

Recently, all of my inspiration has come from my ex-boyfriend, Jacob Black. The 'ex' is there because he cheated on me. I had been dating him for two years, he had been 'tutoring' for half of that. Some good came out of it, though. I found out that my boyfriend was a lying, cheating, bucket of jerk and dumped him. And I got some kick-ass songs that I can get back at him with.

"Do I see a Grammy in our future?"

"Holy-!" I was too far into my writing zone to hear Edward come up and sit by me and then proceed to the scare living daylights out of me. I erased the mark I made when I jumped practically five feet off my chair. "Not if you keep scaring me like that and make me forget my ideas."

Edward threw me his signature lopsided smile, I couldn't help but stare at it. I immediately began blushing. I'm not going to lie, he is defiantly on the 'Top Ten Hottest Guys in School' list along with his brother and Jasper. But we are just best friends, family really, and we have been that way since the diaper days.

"Sorry, I'll try to refrain from spontaneously jumping up behind you from out of nowhere when you are deep into 'lyric writing mode' and clearly not aware of your surroundings."

I smiled sheepishly and punched him on the shoulder.

Mr. Banner walked in then, saving me from further humiliation. He set up his laptop and opened a Power Point.

"Pencils and notebooks out, people. Note taking time. Today's topic: cell functions."

I internally groaned, no way was I going to make it out of this class awake. I propped my head up on my fist as Mr. Banner began flipping through plain, black and white slides. In sheer boredom, I let my mind wander and drift back to Monday night…

_**Flashback, Monday night, the Rush …**_

"Hold still, Bella, I'm almost done… Okay, there." I stood up when Alice's hands left my hair. "Wait! Sit your butt back in that chair! Let me just fix that there..." Alice fluffed my hair a little. "Alright, you're done." I wasn't even able to get off the chair this time. "Hold on, hold on! You need more…" I sighed as Alice grabbed a brush and a compact. She dusted some blush on my cheeks. "There, now you're ready," she said triumphantly with a smile.

"You sure?" I asked, prepared to get in the dreaded make-up chair once more.

"Yes."

"Positive?" I added for teasing measures.

"_Yes_."

I giggled at Alice's irritated little face and admired her handiwork in the mirror. Half of my curled hair was piled on top of my head, my make-up light but dramatic. I could have gone with no make-up at all, but Alice said it would complete the look. I wore tight skinny jeans and a sparkly dark blue tank top. On top of that, I had a plain, light brown, leather vest with the three buttons buttoned. The only problem was the shoes. I convinced Alice down to three inch heels for me. There was still a good chance that I would gouge someone's eye out… or kill them.

"Well done, Alice," I complimented her. She did a little curtsy.

We walked through a side door and into the back stage. Our instruments were sitting by the brick wall. Alice grabbed her banjo and Rosalie her fiddle while Emmett tuned his guitar. Jasper picked up his drumsticks and tapped out the beats on Emmett's back. There were a couple trumpet riffs in this song, so Edward was warming up on his trumpet.

I, having no instrument to tune, peeked out to the crowd from behind the edge of the wall. The room was crowded with dancers, people sitting at the bar or tables. Lights of different colors danced across the bodies with the thumping bass, giving the room a certain energy. The butterflies that I felt in my stomach weren't from nerves but excitement and thrill.

Sitting at a table all by himself was Jacob. He looked frustrated, angry almost. A couple empty beer glasses were strewn in front of him, a half empty one at his lips. There's another lie, he told me he _never_ drank. I narrowed my eyes at him and scowled, I couldn't wait for him to hear this song he inspired.

When it was our time, we got on stage with our instruments and stood in our places. I saw Jacob's eyes widen. I threw him a smirk.

"Hey there, everyone! Where are all the ladies in the crowd tonight that have been done wrong by their man, who have been lied to, deceived, and cheated on? Let me hear you!" A chorus of soprano cheers rang through the room. "This song is for you women, and for those nasty men in our lives," I said into the microphone and more cheers erupted. I turned to wink at a stunned Jacob.

With that, Emmett started plucking the first notes on his base, Alice joined in on her banjo. Then Jasper really picked things up the drums and Rosalie began playing the fiddle.

_Woo hoo!_

_Baby where you been, it's half past ten._  
><em>Oh, look you're late again.<em>  
><em>Busy day, got a lot on your mind?<em>  
><em>You should hear about mine.<em>  
><em>A tall drink of water and a pretty little thing<em>  
><em>Were kissing on the corner in the pouring rain.<em>  
><em>Turned my head to get a better view<em>  
><em>Oh Lord, help me it was you.<em>

_Didn't love me  
>I ain't no fool<br>Didn't love me  
>No, no, no, no.<br>Love, love you let me down  
>Making this too easy<br>Love, Love you let me down  
>Think you should be leaving<br>Love, love you let me down  
>Let me down<br>No you wont string me along  
>You better be moving on<br>Giddy on up  
>Giddy on out<em>

Jacob's face was red with anger as he bolted out of his seat to get the heck away from my painful revenge.

"Oh I ain't finished. Sit back down," I said to him with a smirk of amusement.

I heard the crowd laugh as he reluctantly sat back down.

_Been acting pretty strange, didn't want to talk.  
>Mmm, there's a pep in your walk<br>Smiling a lot when you look at your phone  
>There's a change in your tone.<br>I've been through your pockets and smelled your shirts  
>I don't wear Bath and Body Works<br>Should've seen the signs you were sneakin' around  
>She must be the number on the napkin I found.<em>

_Didn't love me_  
><em>I ain't no fool<em>  
><em>Didn't love me<em>  
><em>No, no, no, no.<em>  
><em>Love, love you let me down<em>  
><em>Making this too easy<em>  
><em>Love, Love you let me down<em>  
><em>Think you should be leaving<em>  
><em>Love, love you let me down<em>  
><em>Let me down<em>  
><em>Oh you wont string me along<em>  
><em>You better be moving on<em>  
><em>Giddy on up<em>  
><em>Giddy on out<em>

_Oh let me tell you_  
><em>I guess you could say that I was blind<em>  
><em>I was blinded by my love<em>**(uh-huh)  
><strong>_I did everything for you  
><em>_And now push has come to shove _**(come to shove)**

_So lets call the spade to spade _**(mm-mmh)**_  
>Was it worth the price you paid? <em>**(uh-uh)**_  
>Now I am done, I'm the lucky one<br>And you can sleep in the bed you've made._

_Didn't love me  
>I ain't no fool<br>Didn't love me  
>No, no, no, no.<br>Love, love you let me down  
>Making this too easy<br>Love, Love you let me down  
>Think you should be leaving<br>Love, love you let me down  
>Let me down<br>Oh you wont string me along_

_Love, love you let me down_  
><em>Making this too easy<em>  
><em>Love, Love you let me down<em>

_Think you should be leaving  
>Love, love you let me down<br>Let me down  
>You wont string me along<br>You better be moving on  
>Giddy on up<br>Giddy on out_

Ending the song with a strong strum on the guitar, I took a bow while the cheering audience clapped and then waved to Jacob. I could imagine the little volcanoes blowing up in that big head of his as he stormed out the door.

We gave each other high fives as we walked off stage with our instruments. I felt a sense of satisfaction flood through me as I pictured Jacob's shocked face.

"That was awesome!" Emmett yelled with enthusiasm. "Did you see the look on his face when we got out there? What I would have done for a camera."

Stepping out of the door, I saw Jacob leaning against our truck. Get your slimy backside off our truck.

"Jacob," Emmett said. "Good to see you again! Actually, that's a lie, but I won't tell you that because it would be rude."

"What? Then why did you say that?" Jacob asked looking confused.

"Because I was insulting you. We get to do that now."

Jacob just scowled at Emmett's amused face and turned to me.

"What the hell was that?" Jacob loudly asked.

"What was what, Jacob?" I replied with a raise of my eyebrows, feigning innocence. "Oh, you mean that song we just did back there? That would be me letting out my anger you caused."

"And you felt you needed to let it out in front of a whole damn room full of people?"

"Yes, yes I did. I write songs about my feelings and then sing them. It's kind of what I do. You of all people should understand that. But what do I know? Half of you had been preoccupied with someone else that whole time." My teasing and sarcastic tone had left and was now replaced by bitterness. I didn't feel like dealing with this right now. "Come on guys, let's go."

We got in our truck and drove home, leaving Jacob still standing in parking lot.

_**Present…**_

"Bella," I heard Edward say, he gently nudged my arm.

Because I was so off in flashback land I nearly fell off my seat.

"Edward! Cut that out, scaring the crap out of people twice in one hour is completely unnecessary."

His crooked smile emerged on his face. "Sorry, I was just wondering if you planned on leaving biology or if you wanted to stay."

I felt a blush rise to my cheeks as I noticed most of the students had left and I still had my notebook open and pencil in hand. Edward stood in front of me with his bag slung over his shoulder.

"Oh, right, of course I am." I threw my things in my bag and went out the door into the flooded hallways with Edward. I turned and waved goodbye to him as I weaved my way through the throng of people to get choir.

* * *

><p><strong>Song notes: Giddy On Up is by Laura Bell Bundy<strong>

**And there you have it! Chapter number one! I was going to wait to post this until after I got the next chapter all nice and finished. But I'm having a case of writers block and we are going camping for about a week tomorrow, so I decided to just put it up :)**

**I hope you liked it! Reviews are well appreciated. The nice kind, please. I like love, not hate. So keep the hate comments to yourself and just don't read it if you don't like it. Thanks. **

**Peace, love, and Twilight,  
><strong>**Katie**


	3. Karma Is A Female Dog

**AHHHH! I can't believe I let this happen! And on the second chapter! I was really hoping I wouldn't have a long time of no updates with this story. But it happened. Shoot. School started though, and ya know… school. I thought I would have time on some days, but then other things got pushed to the top of the list. And my computer is on a steady downwards path and doesn't like to get going very quickly and I would get frustrated and not want to touch it. Anyways… enough excuses! I won't let it happen again. Promise. **

**Voice Font: **_Bella_… **Everybody**

**Album: Dear Jacob…**

**Track #2: Karma Is a Female Dog**

**Track #3: Fiddle**

Karma Is a Female Dog

_**Still Wednesday, October, 6...**_

"What do you think Mrs. Sagen is doing when she's M.I.A. like this?" Alice asked as she balanced a pencil on the curve of her little pixie nose.

"Lost in her endless piles of sheet music, trying to clean a new pee stain courtesy of her shih-tzu, it's also possible that she just forgot to come," Rosalie answered while filing her nails.

I sat on the other side of Alice in the black, lined up chairs with my song journal on my lap. "Quite possible. It's a wonder we know our songs by concert time with what little rehearsals we have."

Mrs. Sagen, the Forks high choir teacher, is late to class ninety nine percent of the time. Mostly, she's just ten or 15 minutes late. She also has those days when she isn't seen for half an hour or more and some people start to wonder if she got locked in a closet or passed out on the floor because she forgot to breath while singing a song back in her little cave of musical wonders. Then there are the days when she is miraculously in the room at the bell. Don't count on that though, it only happens once or twice all semester.

The choir shared a classroom with the band. The chairs were lined up in the middle of the room. A white board was mounted on the wall we faced with a baby grand piano in front. In the extra space to the side of the room was where the instruments were kept, including the drum set and electric guitar for various plays and performances.

Rosalie sighed and looked at the clock. "It's been twenty seven minutes, five more and we will have a new record."

"Ugh, I don't even have homework to do to pass the time. She better get here quick before chaos breaks out," Alice said.

The girl who sat in front of me, Ashlynn, turned around to talk to me. "Bella, we need some entertainment. You should sing something!"

The brunette next to her agreed. "Yeah, you totally should! I love your songs!"

Soon we had the entire girls choir chanting for us to sing and spare them of their boredom. I didn't even have time to respond before Alice pulled me up and dragged me through the chairs to get to the instruments. Rosalie, of course, grabbed a violin and Alice picked up the electric guitar.

With a devious a idea spinning in my head, I grabbed a blue white board marker and drew a stick figure nice and big. Next to him I wrote 'SON OF A BI' but stopped myself. I can't write that, this is school. My devious idea then became a spectacularly devious idea. I rubbed out the 'BI' with the heel of my hand and wrote 'FEMALE DOG' in it's place.

Behind me I heard a chorus of laughter and Alice and Rosalie playing the first notes loud and strong. I sat on the piano and faced the class with a sly smile.

_Well I tried to write an honest song  
>About lyin' &amp; gettin' cheated on,<br>And I'll keep it clean cause Mama taught me right.  
>Still some of us here in this world<em>  
><em>Are too polite &amp; nice 'a girls<br>To say the dapper things here on my mind.  
>Like how he left me like a fool,<br>And that he used a dirty garden tool,  
>And I was just so in love with that Richard-head.<br>So everybody sing along,  
>'Cause Karma's a female dog.<em>

Oh, Karma, one day's gonna haunt ya',  
><em>And I wanna see it bite ya' right on your behind.<br>__So everybody that's been done wrong,  
><em>_Well, come on and sing along,  
><em>'_Cause Karma's a female dog._

_Well, I'll never say this to his face,_  
><em>I'll just go write in on My Space,<em>  
><em>And pray that it's a hit on radio.<em>  
><em>But I though all you girls should know<em>  
><em>That he's a no-good donkey hole<em>  
><em>And I'm gonna do what he done did to me.<em>  
><em>That piece that starts with an "S" and ends with a "hit"<em>  
><em>How did he inspire this family fun and cuss free therapy<em>  
><em>For everybody to sing along<em>

"Everybody now!"

**'Cause Karma's a female dog.**

_Well it don't matter anymore,_  
><em>'Cause my fine behind just hit the door,<em>  
><em>The same one someone else is chasin' now.<em>  
><em>And he'll come runnin' back so fast,<em>  
><em>And I'll tell him to kiss my<em>  
><em>And ask me if I really ever cared.<em>

_And he'll be sayin'_  
><em>Karma, one day's gonna haunt ya',<em>  
><em>And I wanna see it bite ya' right on your<em>  
><em>Back-stabbin', no good cheatin', left me cryin' with your leavin',<em>  
><em>l-l-lyin' when you said you were really good in b-<em>  
><em>-d everybody that's been done wrong,<em>  
><em>Come on and sing along<em>  
><strong>'Cause Karma's a female dog<strong>

**Na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na**_  
><em>**Yeah, Karma's a female dog!**

Laughter and cheers echoed throughout the tall room. It felt so good to let this out, the fury I felt towards Jacob. Most girls in my situation would be curled up on their bed, looking like a mess wearing baggy sweats and mascara making gray rivers down their cheeks, with a bucket of cookie dough ice cream in their laps. That's not me though. I was only filled with pure infuriation. I guess that's just the way I am, I don't want a pity party. Plus, I have such a strong support system telling me that he's not worth my tears.

At that moment, Mrs. Sagen walked through the door, wearing her signature ridiculous and colorful style.

"I'm here, girls! So sorry, I had misplaced my left shoe and lost track of time searching for it. I finally found it in Mr. Henry's tuba! Alrighty, let's see what we can do with 12 minutes."

Classic Mrs. Sagen.

_**Lunchtime…**_

"Good Lord, Emmett. Give the poor chicken a break and come up for air," Jasper said as he sat down at the lunch table next to Alice.

Emmett rolled his eyes and finished the last two bites of his drum stick and dropped the bone on his tray. "So, Miss Bella, I heard you kicked ass today in choir."

"How do you know about that? It happened like, twenty minutes ago."

"Are you kidding me? The entire school knows!"

"Ugh." I felt a blush grow on my cheeks. I may seem like the most out going person when I'm on stage, but I'm actually really shy. It's as if a guitar and microphone completely transform me. Any other time, though, I would much rather like to stay on the sidelines.

"I wouldn't find it something to be ashamed about, Bella. Letting people know that you're not someone to be messed with is generally a good thing," Rosalie said.

"And now the male population knows you're back on the market," Alice added, waggling her eyebrows.

I threw a fry at her face. "Alice, I just broke up with my boyfriend because he cheated on me, I don't really want to get into another relationship right now. So you can tell the male population that I'm not interested." She just rolled her eyes.

"So," I said loudly, trying to change the subject. "Are we all set on our performance tonight?"

_**Tonight…**_

We all know that Rosalie is amazing with the violin, but she can really fiddle on that thing. Serious Devil Went Down To Georgia fiddling. It's insane to a ridiculous degree. I always get excited when we start a song that she can really go to town with. It get's the audience super riled up which gets me riled up which gets the rest of the band riled up which results in an outstanding show. Needless to say, tonight is going to be amazing.

Everyone got on stage and in their respective spots. Rosalie took center stage under the bright spotlight. I stood behind her just to the right. The moment Jasper hit the first beat, Rosalie's bow was dancing erratically across the strings. Her body dipped and turned and jumped with music She slowed just a bit after her intro and held a note out real long. That's when I jumped in.

_Stepped into the spotlight  
>Of this traveling show<br>Went across the room  
>Those big blue eyes look in my soul<br>I was singing fatal love  
>How was I to know<br>That boy would change my plans_

_Louisiana soldiers seem to have it all_  
><em>As that old red curtain fell<em>  
><em>I began to fall<br>__I was packing up my case  
><em>_He was waiting down the hall  
><em>_When the real show began_

_Cause to win my heart strings_  
><em>And promised me the moon<em>  
><em>Played me hard<em>  
><em>Until I cried out of tune<em>  
><em>Took my song<em>  
><em>And he left me worn out 'n brittle<em>  
><em>Played me like a fiddle<em>

_Well I should have gone_  
><em>And taken his boat and his backside<em>  
><em>When he went and told me one thing<em>  
><em>And then turned around and lied<em>  
><em>Well I lost all my dignity<em>  
><em>But I sure kept my pride<em>  
><em>And he was sure good for a song<em>

_Cause to win my heart strings_  
><em>And promised me the moon<em>  
><em>Played me hard<em>  
><em>Until I cried out of tune<em>  
><em>Took my song<em>  
><em>And he left me worn out 'n brittle<em>  
><em>Played me like a<em>  
><em>Hey<em>

_Now ladies you beware_  
><em>Of those in assuming eyes<em>  
><em>He might look so innocent<em>  
><em>But its just a disguise<em>  
><em>He's just overcompensating<em>  
><em>For a total pack of lies<em>  
><em>In his little tiny heart<em>…

_Cause to win my heart strings_  
><em>And promised me the moon<em>  
><em>Played me hard<em>  
><em>Until I cried out of tune<em>  
><em>Took my song<br>__And he left me pissed off 'n brittle  
><em>_Played me like a fiddle_

_Oh, oh, aoh_  
><em>Oh, oh, aoh<em>  
><em>Oh, oh, aoh<em>

* * *

><p><strong>Song Notes: Karma's a Female Dog and Fiddle are both by Bomshel<strong>

**Just a fun little detail… Mrs. Sagen used to be my choir teacher, best I ever had. The craziness of this Sagen is bit exaggerated, though. **

**Once again, won't let happen ever again. Promise, promise, promise. **

**Peace, love, and Twilight,**

**Katie**


	4. Undo It

**See, I told you I wouldn't take so long next time. I kept my promise!**

* * *

><p><strong>Voice font: <strong>_Bella_ … **Alice and Rosalie**

**Album: Dear Jacob…  
><strong>**Track #4: Undo It  
><strong>**Track #5: Picture To Burn**

Undo It

_**Monday, October 11...**_

Curse Alice and her inability to shut her mouth. Okay, maybe I had a small part in it… a lot really. I was the one who started singing. Alright, Alice had pretty much nothing to do with it. She was, however, correct when she said guys were going to notice that I was single. Why they had any interest was beyond me. It has been two school days since that choir class and I have five unwanted phone numbers.

I grabbed the books I needed for homework and shoved them in my backpack. I noticed a slip of paper with seven digits wedged in the slits of my open locker door. I groaned and tore it to pieces. Make that six.

I hitched my bag higher on my shoulder and slammed the door shut then nearly had a heart attack. It was like one of the movie scenes where a guy is standing unnoticed behind an open locker door until the person standing there closes it.

"Ah! Why did you do that?" I screamed and immediately felt my face go red.

Tyler Crowley stood in front of me, a 'trying too hard to look really hot' smile was his face. It was failing though, he looked a little constipated. I tried to hold back the grimace, but I don't know how successful I was.

"I hear Bella Swan is single again," he said. I didn't hide my distaste this time.

"Oh really? Someone must have told the National Enquirer because everybody seems to know that." I started walking towards the door in an attempt of nicely hinting to him that I wanted be as far away from him as possible. It didn't work.

"That's a shame, you know. Everybody needs someone to love-"

Nope, I don't want to hear anymore. I spun around on my heels to face him. "Is there something I can help you with, Tyler?" I said rather sharply.

"Can I have your number?"

"Sure, give me your social security number while we're at it."

"What? Why would I do that?"

"Exactly, those are the kind of things that you only give to people who need them, so no." I left him standing rejected in the hallway and made my way to the front doors.

Alice caught up with me half way, hooking her arm through mine. "Hey there, gorgeous. Why are we looking so sour pussy today?"

"Guess."

"Ah. Was it dinner and a movie, homecoming, or the mother of their babies?"

"Alice!" I threw my elbow at her stomach but she neatly dodged it.

"Sorry, sorry. I'm just teasing. So who was it?"

"Tyler Crowley."

She scowled. "That boy needs to get a life that doesn't involve getting into other girls' pants"

By now, we had arrived at Edward's Volvo. I rode home with Edward, Emmett, and Alice since they go past my house on their way home. Rosalie and Jasper went in Rosalie's bright red BMW. Seeing the empty space next to the Volvo, I assumed the two had already left.

Edward was already in the driver's seat, Debussy playing through the speaker. Alice and I put our bags in the trunk and got in the back seat. Alice carefully rearranged her shirt before buckling her seatbelt. I saw Edward looking at her in the rearview mirror.

"Why must you always wear such tight shirts?"

"I like wearing tight shirts, it makes my tummy feel secure," Alice replied as Emmett opened the passenger door.

"You wear girdles?" He asked.

"What? No! Why would you think that?"

Emmett laughed. "All I heard of the conversation was 'secure tummy.'"

"Which immediately leads you to girdle? Do you think I _need_ a girdle?" Alice's voice was full of horror.

"Calm down, you don't have an ounce of fat on you. Except in your earlobes." Emmett added.

Alice glowered at him and her little fingers went to her earlobes.

Emmett, deciding he was done talking about that, pulled out his iPod. Both Edward and I sighed as he plugged it, taking away Debussy.

I could tell that Edward noticed our synchronized dismay because he looked at me through his rearview mirror and smiled.

_**Later …**_

"We'll pick you up at five tonight, Bella," Emmett told me as I stepped out of the car.

"'Kay, see you then." I waved goodbye as they drove down the road, then I turned and walked up to the front door. We were playing at Carnival Ride tonight. We tried to get the early slots during the week so we could get home at a decent hour for school the next day.

"Dad, I'm home!" I yelled as I walked through the door. I found Charlie sitting on the couch watching a football game.

"Hi, Bells. How was school?"

"Good."

"That's good."

He wasn't very conversational.

I hung my coat up and headed up stairs to do my homework before I had to leave. I often got distracted, though, by my song journal. When 4:45 came around, I went to the kitchen and made a ham sandwich for dinner. I grabbed a water bottler when the Big Band Trunk stopped in front of the driveway.

"Bye, dad," I said as I opened the door, balancing my sandwich and water in the other hand.

"Have fun."

I ran to the truck and hopped in through the door Edward opened for me.

"Hi there, everybody." I sat down and started eating my sandwich.

"Bella!" Alice squealed and hugged me so tight the bite I just took nearly fell out my mouth.

"Alice, let the poor girl breath," Emmett said with a chuckle.

"Whoops, sorry. I'm so excited! I have the best outfit ideas for tonight."

While Alice chattered on about the perfect ensembles she had planned, I tuned it out and finished my dinner, using Edward's hand as a cup holder. We pulled up in front of the Hale house to pick up Rosalie and Jasper. Rose slid into the passenger seat and was immediately pulled into Alice's clothing conversation. Jasper kissed Alice on the cheek as he took his seat next to her. After twenty minutes, we entered the Carnival Ride parking lot. Rosalie was bouncing in her seat.

"Calm yourself, babe," Emmett said to Rosalie. "We aren't meeting Justin Beiber."

In minutes, Alice had her on-the-road beauty salon set up in the back of truck after the guys had pulled out the equipment. She had a small table bolted to side of the door with a mirror above it. Makeup and hair tool boxes were piled underneath it. Pull out racks of clothing were pulled out, ready to be dug through.

Alice had put together dark skinny jeans and brown cowboy boots for us girls. I was wearing a sparkly, red tank top with my hair up in curly pony tail. A few spiraled tendrils framed my face. The other two had silver, sparkly tank tops.

As we walked on stage I scanned the room for Jacob. There he was, all alone, sitting in his little bubble of misery, woe and beer bottles. If I didn't know any better, I would have felt sorry for him. When he looked up his face went red and his eyes bulged at the sight of me.

I stepped up to the microphone and held the stand as I spoke. "There are some things in my life that I would like to change and take back. During a period of my life, I thought I was so in love. But, it turned out not so great. I wanna undo it!"

The moment I finished speaking the first notes were play and I began stomping my foot to the beat.

_I should have known by the way you passed my by  
>There was something in your eyes and it wasn't right<br>I should have walked, but I never had the chance  
>Everything got out of hand, and I let it slide<br>Now I only have myself to blame  
>For falling for your stupid games<br>I wish my life could be the way it was before I saw your face_

_You stole my happy_  
><em>You made my cry<em>  
><em>Took the lonely and took me for a ride<em>  
><em>And I wanna Uh-uh-uh-uh-uh undo it<em>  
><em>You had my heart, now I want it back<em>  
><em>I'm starting to see everything you lack<em>  
><em>Boy, you blew it<em>  
><em>You put me through it<em>  
><em>I wanna Uh-uh-uh-uh-uh undo it<em>

**Na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na**

_Now your photos don't have a picture frame  
>And I never say your name, and I never will<br>And all your things, well I threw 'em in the trash  
>And I'm not even sad<br>Now you only have yourself to blame  
>For playing all those stupid games<br>You're always gonna be the same  
>Oh no, you'll never change<em>  
><em><br>You stole my happy  
>You made my cry<br>Took the lonely and took me for a ride  
>And I wanna Uh-uh-uh-uh-uh undo it<br>You had my heart, now I want it back  
>I'm starting to see everything you lack<br>Boy, you blew it  
>You put me through it<br>I wanna Uh-uh-uh-uh-uh undo it_

**Na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na  
><strong>  
><em>You want my future<br>You can't have it  
>I'm still trying to erase you from my past<br>I need you gone so fast_

_You stole my happy_  
><em>You made my cry<em>  
><em>Took the lonely and took me for a ride<em>  
><em>And I wanna Uh-uh-uh-uh-uh undo it<em>  
><em>You had my heart, now I want it back<em>  
><em>I'm starting to see everything you lack<em>  
><em>Boy, you blew it<em>  
><em>You put me through it<em>  
><em>I wanna Uh-uh-uh-uh-uh undo it<em>

The music ended abruptly and we all clapped with smiles on our faces. Not so much for Jacob though.

While trying to calm my breathing down from the show I just put on, I told everyone in the audience, "you know what? I think I'm over it."

Our second song started with a strong drum beat and electric guitar followed by Alice's banjo.

_State the obvious,  
>I didn't get my perfect fantasy<br>I realized you love yourself  
>More that you could ever love me<br>So go and tell your friends  
>That I'm obsessive and crazy,<br>That's fine you won't mind if I say  
><em>_by the way_

I pointed to Jacob and winked at him as I sang the first verse.

_I hate that stupid old pickup truck,_  
><em>You never let me drive<br>You're a redneck, heartbreak  
>Who's really bad at lying<br>So watch me strike a match  
>On all my wasted time<br>As far as I'm concerned,  
>You're just another picture to burn.<em>

_There's no time for tears_  
><em>I'm just sitting here planning my revenge<em>  
><em>There's nothing stopping me<em>  
><em>From going out with all of your best friends<em>  
><em>And if you come around saying' sorry to me<em>  
><em>My daddy's going to show you how sorry you'll be<em>

_'Cause I hate that stupid old pickup truck,__  
><em>_You never let me drive_  
><em>You're a redneck, heartbreak<br>Who's really bad at lying  
>So watch me strike a match<br>On all my wasted time  
>As far as I'm concerned,<br>You're just another picture to burn._

_And if you're missing me_  
><em>You better keep it to yourself<em>  
><em>'Cause coming back around here<em>  
><em>Would be bad for your health<em>

_'Cause I hate that stupid old pickup truck,_  
><em>You never let me drive<em>  
><em>You're a redneck, heartbreak<em>  
><em>Who's really bad at lying<em>  
><em>So watch me strike a match<em>  
><em>On all my wasted time<em>  
><em>In case you haven't heard,<em>

_I really, really hate that stupid old pickup truck,  
><em>_You never let me drive  
>You're a redneck, heartbreak<br>Who's really bad at lying  
>So watch me strike a match<br>On all my wasted time  
>As far as I'm concerned,<em>  
><em>You're just another picture to burn.<br>Burn, burn, burn, baby burn.  
>Just another picture to burn<br>Baby burn_

The guitar faded out and we all took a smiling bow. I saw Jacob stand and start walking towards the backstage door. This is going to be interesting.

* * *

><p><strong>I'm sorry they've been short. I keep thinking "Hey! This one's pretty long!" But really it's just a bunch of lyrics... they do get longer, though!<strong>

**Don't forget to check out the links to the music videos on my profile page. **

**Song notes: Undo It is by Carrie Underwood, Picture to Burn is by Taylor Swift**


	5. Should've Said No

**Hello again my friends! Welcome back to my story. I'm sorry this one took longer, but I didn't anticipate Windows 7 taking 3 days to download. It was a lot fun.**

* * *

><p><strong>Voice font:<strong>_ Bella  
><em>**Album: Dear Jacob…  
><strong>**Track #6: Should've Said No  
><strong>**Track #7: Long Gone**

Should've Said No

_**Still Monday, October 11...**_

"Do you know how much I love our job?" Rosalie exclaimed when we were surrounded by the cords and ropes that is backstage.

"I wouldn't call it a job," Edward said. "More like a very involved hobby." Rosalie rolled her eyes.

"Hey, guys, I saw Jacob making his way back here so-"

"Why the hell do you keep doing this to me?" Speak of the devil…

I put on my game face and turned around. "Why do you keep talking to me? Haven't I made it clear that I don't want you my life anymore?"

"Just listen here, I don't want to have this fight right now."

"It's a little late for that." A biting tone seeped into my voice. "You shouldn't have done what you did. Then we wouldn't be having this fight right now." I noticed that the Cullens and Hales had moved closer to the door to give us some privacy. I'm sure a select few were still listening.

"And I'm trying to say that I'm sorry for it." Well that took me off guard. Jacob was never one to admit he was wrong.

"Apology not accepted." I tried to walk away but his pleading made me stop.

"Bella, please, if I could take all of that back, I would."

"Then why did you do it?" Facing him again and trying to keep the venom out of my words, I said, "you may be sorry, Jacob, but that doesn't turn back time and erase what you did to me. It won't take away the lies and deception."

_It's strange to think the songs we used to sing  
>The smiles, the flowers, everything is gone<br>Yesterday I found out about you  
>Even now just looking at you feels wrong<em>

_You say that you'd take it all back, given one chance_  
><em>It was a moment of weakness and you said yes<em>

_You should've said no, you should've gone home_  
><em>You should've thought twice 'fore you let it all go<em>  
><em>You should've known that word<em>  
><em>'Bout what you did with her'd get back to me<em>

_And I should've been there in the back of your mind  
>I shouldn't be asking myself why<br>You shouldn't be begging for forgiveness at my feet  
>You should've said no, baby and you might still have me<em>

_You can see that I've been crying_  
><em>And baby you know all the right things to say<em>  
><em>But do you honestly expect me to believe<em>  
><em>We could ever be the same<em>

_You say that the past is the past, you need one chance_  
><em>It was a moment of weakness and you said yes<em>

_You should've said no, you should've gone home_  
><em>You should've thought twice 'fore you let it all go<em>  
><em>You should've known that word<em>  
><em>'Bout what you did with her'd get back to me<em>

_And I should've been there in the back of your mind_  
><em>I shouldn't be asking myself why<em>  
><em>You shouldn't be begging for forgiveness at my feet<em>  
><em>You should've said no, baby and you might still have me<em>

_I can't resist before you go tell me this_  
><em>Was it worth it? Was she worth this?<br>__No, no, no, no, no, no_

_You should've said no, you should've gone home_  
><em>You should've thought twice 'fore you let it all go<em>  
><em>You should've known that word<em>  
><em>'Bout what you did with her'd get back to me<em>

_And I should've been there in the back of your mind  
>I shouldn't be asking myself why<br>You shouldn't be begging for forgiveness at my feet  
>You should've said no, baby and you might still have me<em>

He looked defeated as I turned around without another word. I walked over to where the others stood. My frustrated face told them I was ready to go home. Edward put his arm around my shoulders as we left for the truck and I laid my head on his shoulder.

My mood had been deflated and spiced with irritation. Jacob needed to understand that I wasn't going back to him no matter how many times he said sorry, no matter how much he wanted to take back what he did. He cheated on me and broke what we had. If truly wanted me back, if he truly wanted to redo it all, he wouldn't have lied to me in the first place.

_**Tuesday, October 12...**_

After school the next day, everyone came over to my house. Not for anything special, just because. We were all in the kitchen snacking on the snicker doodle cookies I made, the scent still fresh in the air. They were quite delicious if I do say so myself. I decided that a cold glass of milk was necessary to complete these perfect cookies.

"What do you think, half full or half empty?" I asked to no one in particular, but I immediately regretted asking it the moment the words left my lips.

"Defiantly half full," Emmett answered, very sure of himself.

"No way, it's half empty," Alice countered.

Emmett looked shocked at the comment. "What kind of twisted world are you living in? When you pour the milk, you are _filling_ the glass. There for, it's half _full_."

"Perhaps you shouldn't have said anything," Edward whispered in my ear. I giggled in agreement. The conflicts between Emmett and Alice are known to get intense and wildly out of control.

"That's exactly why it's half empty. You want to fill the glass with milk when you pour it, but you've got all that empty space on top. Half empty."

"I object!"

"Overruled!"

"You can't overrule me, I'm older than you!"

"But I-"

"Just drink the damn milk and get it over with!" I quickly responded to Jasper's outburst by promptly chugging the milk before anyone exploded.

"Well," Edward said. "Now that that's settled-"

_Ding-dong!_

The doorbell rang throughout house and I groaned as I stood to see who it was. Who would have the nerve to come and interrupt our cookie eating? That question was answered as soon as I opened the door.

"What do you want, Jacob?" The biting tone reserved especially for him was back in my voice.

He stood on the front porch with a bouquet of flowers, an innocent smile on his face.

"I got you flowers." He held them out for me but I made no move to take them, suspicious of his reason.

"Why?"

"To try to show you that I'm truly sorry."

I scoffed at him. "Because a handful of limpy flowers is just the way to say that. You can leave, Jacob, I don't want to see you anymore." I attempted to close the door but his darn hand was in the way.

"Come on, Bella. You don't have to take me back or even like me. Just say you forgive me," he pleaded.

"No," I said with a firm voice. "Looking back, I remember that you seemed to mess up a lot. You show up late for a date, you forget about something we had planned, or you don't call when you say you will. I forgave you every time. I was the girl who would forgive and forget because I was just so in love, and I'm sure that's what you're expecting now. But now that you've shown me who you really are, it's not going to work like that, I'm not that same girl anymore."

_It's so like you just to show up at my door  
>And act like nothin's happened<br>You think I'll sweep my heart up off the floor  
>And give it to you<br>Like so many times before  
>You're talking to a stranger<br>I'm not that girl anymore_

_That girl is long gone_  
><em>Boy you missed the boat it just sailed away<em>  
><em>Long gone<em>  
><em>She's not drowning in her yesterdays<em>  
><em>Betcha never thought I'd be that strong<em>  
><em>Well this girl is long gone<em>

"But, Bella, please just-"

_Don't waste your breath with baby baby please  
>Cuz I am so not listening<br>Don't bother getting down upon your knees and try to beg me  
>I'm tired of how you twist the truth<br>You're not talking to the same girl  
>Who used to forgive you<em>

_That girl is long gone  
>Boy you missed the boat it just sailed away<br>Long gone  
>She's not drowning in her yesterdays<br>Betcha never thought I'd be that strong  
>Well this girl is long gone<em>

_Gone like the wind under Superman's cape  
>Like a thief in the night I made the great escape<br>I'm not the kind of girl that keeps making the same mistakes__  
><em>_  
>That girl is long gone<br>Boy you missed the boat it just sailed away  
>Long gone<br>I'm not drowning in my yesterdays  
>Betcha never thought I'd be that strong, betcha didn't<br>Yeah well baby I proved you wrong  
>This girl is long gone, long gone<br>This girl is long gone, long gone  
>This girl is long gone<br>This girl is gone_

"You can stop trying to get an apology out of me, it ain't going to happen."

I slammed the door in his face and slid the chain lock home. I turned and leaned my back against the door and let out a frustrated puff of air. I saw Edward leaning against the kitchen door frame, watching me as I pulled myself back together.

"You okay?" He asked as I walked towards him.

I took a deep breath. "Yeah, Jacob is just really getting on my nerves, even more so than he was before."

Edward's eyebrows raised. "Wow, those must be some powerful emotions. I didn't think it was possible for them to grow considering how enraged you were towards him before." I could tell he was teasing me now because of his crooked grin.

"You should be very afraid of my powerful emotions. You've seen what can come out of them."

"Ah yes, your songs full of revenge and humiliation. Of course, I know your weakness of being frightened by people jumping up from behind you which scares the song away." He tapped my nose, his eyes crinkled from the smile on his face.

"Oh, shut up," I said, swatting his hand away and laughed at our teasing. "I sure hope you killed Emmett before he ate all of my snicker doodles, I could sure use one of those right now."

"For those cookies, I'd kill him any day." Edward winked at me and we both laughed again as we walked back into the kitchen together.

* * *

><p><strong>Song notes: Should've Said No is by Taylor Swift, Long Gone is by Lady Antebellum<strong>

**Shoot. Another short one. But hey, you got some Edward in there! The next one is longer and there is more Edward! **

**Now I have a very important question, one so incredibly crucial that it must be asked right at this very moment… Who saw Breaking Dawn today and nearly had a heart attack? I did! I'll try to keep the rambling down by just saying that is absolutely amazing. Best one, no contest whatsoever. My Twilight high is still going strong.**

**Anyhoo… until next time!**

**Peace, love, and Twilight,  
><strong>**Katie**


	6. The Bed That You Made

**Shoot. That one took a long time again. Sorry, but there is thing called Thanksgiving, family, and my mother plus Christmas decorating, cookie making, present shopping and general holiday chaos. Long story short, my mom gets a little wacky when around this time of the year. I did manage to find time, though! So here ya go…**

* * *

><p><strong>Voice font: <strong>_Bella_ … **Alice and Rosalie**

**Album: Dear Jacob…**

**Track #8: The Bed That You Made **

**Track #9: When I Said I Would**

The Bed That You Made

_**Saturday, October 23...**_

It has been almost two weeks since Jacob showed up at my house. I suppose I have finally driven the concept that I no longer want him in my life into his head. I still see him though. Around town, at the diners, places we perform. He is always sulking and moping about, dragging his feet with his head hung.

Did it hit him that hard? It couldn't have, this is the indestructible Jacob Black. Maybe I had found his weakness. I know that he doesn't like to be told no, he never has. A part of me, a very small miniscule part of me, felt bad. But it was mostly satisfaction. I have said that I'm angry about this whole situation, that I'm not going cry my eyes out like a hormone raged teenager. But it still hurts, it always hurts when you're lied too. Especially when that lie is something big. Now he is getting a taste of that pain. Not the same pain, but pain nonetheless. Now don't get me wrong here, I'm not trying to be a cruel villain, I just want there to be more punishment than vengeful songs.

Anyways… Let's get on a new topic that isn't so dreary.

On Saturdays, we like to spend some extra time at our performance venues. Tonight it was at Revolution. It wasn't so much as a club but a concert warehouse, a big building where people could perform and others could come watch and dance. There were tables and booths scattered around the edges.

Four out of the six of us loved these breaks from performing and being part of the audience that dances quite enthusiastically under the strobe lights, moving with the beat of the drums. I was not one of them. I couldn't find the enjoyment that some people do while being tossed around in a huge mass of sweaty bodies. I usually came up with excuses like, "I have a killer headache, I need to sit before I pass out." Or, "good Lord, the cramps are here, I think I need a tampon and a handful of Advil." Then there's the good old "make me stay here for two more seconds and I may have to kill you."

Today, I used the 'holy crap, I gotta pee' line and made a beeline for anywhere but there. I found Edward hiding in a booth after a couple minutes of pushing through people. His face lit up when he spotted me. I slid in next to him, grateful to be off my feet.

"I see you finally escaped their evil clutches?" He asked me with a smile.

I've always loved that smile…

"Kind of, I'm relieving my full bladder right now."

"Ah," he replied with a smirk.

"What about you?"

"I'm getting a drink, but the line is absolutely horrendous," he said very dramatically with mock irritation. "Which is why it's taken me half an hour."

I chuckled. "Clever."

"You know, if Alice saw us just sitting here she would throw a spectacular fit and lecture us about the importance of socializing and mingling," Edward said.

"Well, I have a solution to this dilemma: let's not get caught."

Edward laughed. "What an Einstein you are."

Then he asked me if I had pen and grabbed a napkin. I dug my red pen out of my bag and handed it to him, confused about where he was going with this. He opened the napkin and drew two lines perpendicular to each other. On the bottom were a series of dashes and the alphabet off to the side. A smile grew on my face when I realized what he was doing.

I saw a matching smile on Edward as he said, "Remember when we were kids, we would do this at restaurants? Play Hangman using one of the many pens from Esme's purse until the napkin was covered?"

"Yes, I do."

"Okay, guess a letter."

"Um…" fifteen letters, three words. "Let's go with 'S'."

"Nope." Edward drew a circle for the head and crossed off 'S'.

"'T'."

"Ding ding ding! We have a winner!" He put a 'T' in the last word.

"I'd like to buy a vowel please, 'U'."

"Bella's on a roll," Edward said as he wrote a 'U' in three spaces.

After that, I went downhill and gained a body and three limbs. But I got two 'E's, an 'R' and an 'L'. I had just earned myself another leg when I heard an angry foot tapping and steam pouring out two little ears.

"I'd be more mad if we weren't late for getting ready. I thought you had gotten raped or killed by an axe murderer, Bella!" Alice said with her face pinched in frustration. "And I spent like, twenty minutes looking for you."

"Sor-"

"No time for apologies, you can do that later. Now march your butt to the Big Band Truck. You too, mister."

I rolled my eyes and started walking towards the door with Edward. I looked behind me when I didn't hear Alice's chatter. She was still at the table, staring at the napkin we wrote on with a curious face. Suddenly, her eyebrows shot up and she shoved the napkin in her purse.

What was that about?

_**Later…**_

It has become a habit to scan the room for Jacob. Since there are two other clubs in the area before it becomes a lengthy trip, it's a pretty good chance that our little buddy will be in the audience. I found him at a table near the wall, a beer in hand. I think he's developing an alcohol problem.

The crowd cheered as we walked onto the stage. This caused Jacob to lift his head. That look on his face he gets every time this happens appeared. I'm really loving that face. But you'd think Jacob wouldn't be so surprised to see us up on stage, it's kind of what we do.

I walked up to the microphone, the heels of my knee-high black boots clicking on the stage.

"Hey, there everybody!" That Singer Bella I told you about earlier came out as I spoke into the microphone. "Now boys, when you do things that us girls don't particularly like -as in cheating- we tend to get a little mad. This usually ends in a breakup that you boys aren't too happy about. Then you will get all sad and mope around. But, honey, you made that bed you're lying on!"

Everybody clapped and cheered, all the ladies standing out. I started singing as soon as the drum beat began and I clapped to the beat.

_Oh Honey, what's wrong with you  
>You're sittin' around whinin' and cryin' the blues<br>You ain't got no arms to fall into  
>What you did to me I'm doing back to you<br>_

_Honey I'm going out tonight  
>In my high heel boots and my jeans on tight<br>Get my drinks for free fill my appetite  
>You'll be thinking bout me and I'll be out of your sight<em>

_I bet you wished you stayed  
>But like a little dog you up and strayed<br>Well how's if feel to be feeling that way  
><em>

_Lying in a bed that you made  
>Ling in a bed that you made<br>_

_Oh sweet baby your just a cheatin' kind  
>You can say what you want but you can never lie<br>You were out on the town and on the prowl  
>Thinkin' that I wouldn't find out some how<br>_

_Well baby I got news for you  
>Gonna show you how well I can do that too<br>Gonna clap my hands gonna shake my hips  
>Gonna make you remember what you'll never forget<em>

_I bet you wished you stayed_  
><em>But like a little dog you up and strayed<em>  
><em>How's if feel to be feeling that way<em>

_Lying in a bed that you made  
>Lying in that bed<em>

I saw Jacob's face get very red and he shoved his chair out and stood up, storming out of the doors. He turned his head around for one more look before he stepped outside. I gave him a little wave._  
><em>

_I hope its cold there rough there on your own  
>I hope you can't sleep you want me and<br>I'll be gone, gone, gone long gone  
><em>

He slammed the door shut.

_Oh Honey, what's wrong with you  
>You're sittin' around whinin' and cryin' the blues<br>You ain't got no arms to fall into  
>In that king size bed for the king of fools<em>

_I hope its lonely, lonely to the bone  
>Yeah I hope it is<br>I hope you cant sleep and you want me and  
>I'll be gone, gone, gone long gone<br>_

_I bet you wished you stayed  
>But like a little dog you up and strayed<br>How's if feel to be feeling that way  
><em>

_Lying in a bed that you made  
><em>_Lying in a bed that you made  
><em>_Lying in a bed that you made  
><em>_Lying in a bed the you made  
><em>_  
>Lying in that bed<em>  
><em>Goodnight baby<br>__Sleep tight  
><em>_Gonna be alright?_

_**Later…**_

The buzzing feeling that was coursing through my body from the performance vanished when I saw Jacob leaning against his newly cleaned-up truck. God, I hate that truck. He was rolling an almost empty beer bottle between his hands.

"You know," Jacob jumped when he heard my voice. "As the daughter of the Chief of Police I have the easy ability to report your underage drinking. And I know Charlie wouldn't hesitate to throw you in jail."

He just scowled and took a sip.

"I see your car is fixed. Didn't you like the adjustments Edward and I made?"

Still nothing.

I sighed. "Are you really this miserable? Being taught a much needed lesson is not the end of the world. Honestly, Jacob, get your life together."

"My life is just fine," he said with a force that made me believe it wasn't totally true.

"Are you sure? Because it sure doesn't look that way."

"Yes."

"So, you sitting all by yourself getting drunk is a perfect life?"

"I'm not getting drunk," he mumbled.

I arched an eyebrow.

"My life is fine," he repeated. "I can live just as well without you. I can do whatever I want, I don't need you." He doesn't need me? I never said anything about needing me.

"Yeah? Well that's not how it looks. You have to quit moping around, Jacob. This is ridiculous. Move on. I have."

"I have moved on." There was just a little too much fore in his words. "I could easily find myself a new girlfriend to prove it." They way he said 'find a new girlfriend' made it sound like it was a game to him and I hated him even more.

"Oh really?"

"Yes, really." He angrily threw his car door open, got in and slammed it shut. Then he started the engine and peeled out of the parking lot. I watched him fly down the road as he narrowly missed a trash can and a man crossing the street.

That boy is a mess.

_**Tuesday, October 26... **_

I haven't seen much of Jacob the past couple of days. I figure he's avoiding me so I can't see how his life really is awful without me. Or he's frantically searching for a brag worthy girlfriend that he can shove in my face the next time he sees me.

Golden Eyes is back at Rush tonight. The place where truths unraveled into a chaotic mess. I sure hope no more mess comes out of this place. The room was unusually packed for a Tuesday evening. This made it particularly difficult to find Jacob, I had a feeling he was here though.

I heard the people clapping as we took our place on stage. Alice and Jasper started the song with an up-beat yet mellow banjo riff and drum beat. I came in after a few measures.

_The first time that I ever saw your face  
>I felt something stop me in my place<br>The kinda thing that you just can't see  
>Coming your way<em>

Emmett joined in with his guitar and picked things up.

_I closed my eyes and I jumped right in_  
><em>Zero to sixty into the wind<em>  
><em>With my head held high like it was<em>  
><em>Never gonna end<em>  
><em>And I trusted you<em>  
><em>When you asked me to<em>

_When I said I would_  
><em>Tell me what was I thinking<em>  
><em>I gave my heart without even blinking<em>  
><em>That's all you got?<em>  
><em>Well baby that's just no good<em>  
><em>(Whoa)<em>  
><em>Don't give me that line<em>  
><em>You know I won't buy it<em>  
><em>You're as good at love<em>  
><em>As you are at lying<em>  
><em>You said "uh-huh"<em>  
><em>But I just don't think<em>  
><em>You understood<em>  
><em>When I said I would<em>

_I stood by you played by the rules_  
><em>For a second I thought that you did too<em>  
><em>Makes me wonder how long you<em>  
><em>Would have let me be your fool<em>  
><em>I gave it my best<em>  
><em>This is what I get<em>

_When I said I would_  
><em>Tell me what was I thinking<em>  
><em>I gave my heart without even blinking<em>

_That's all you got?  
>Well, baby that's just no good<br>(Whoa)  
>Don't give me that line<br>You know I won't buy it  
>You're as good at love<br>As you are at lying  
>You said "uh-huh"<br>But I just don't think  
>You understood<br>When I said I would  
>Uhhuhhuhh<br>When I said I would_

_I'm taking back  
><em>**When I said I would love you**_  
>I'm taking back<br>_**Every kiss that I gave you**_  
>I'm taking back<br>**Every promise I made you**  
>I'm taking back everything I said<em>

_When I said I would_  
><em>Tell me what was I thinking<em>  
><em>I gave my heart without even blinking<em>  
><em>That's all you got?<em>  
><em>Well, baby that's just no good<em>  
><em>(Whoa)<em>  
><em>Don't give me that line<em>  
><em>You know I won't buy it<em>  
><em>You're as good at love<em>  
><em>As you are at lying<em>  
><em>You said "Uh-huh"<em>  
><em>But I just don't think<em>  
><em>You understood<em>  
><em>When I said I would<em>  
><em>When I said I would<em>

_(Whoa)_  
><em>Don't give me that line<em>  
><em>You know I won't buy it<em>  
><em>You're as good at love<em>  
><em>As you are at lying<em>  
><em>You said "Uh-huh"<em>  
><em>But I just don't think<em>  
><em>You understood<em>  
><em>When I said I would<em>  
><em>When I said I would<em>

Emmett's guitar faded out and everyone cheered. We took a bow, smiles nearly cracking our faces in half. As I stood back up my excitement deflated as I looked at the back corner of the room. Jacob has made a habit of doing that. Killing the joy I feel with the stupid things he does. It was more shock this time though.

He was wearing a grin on his face. I saw his eyes move to meet my staring ones. His grin became a mocking smirk. Sitting in a chair across from him was a girl. Her back was to me so I couldn't tell who she was. She had long, dark, wavy hair. Even though she was sitting, I could tell she was tall and slender. She must have seen his eyes move to the stage because she turned around.

I gasped when I saw who it was. What is Jacob doing?

* * *

><p><strong>Song notes: The Bed That You Made and When I Said I Would are both by Whitney Duncan<strong>

**I promised more Edward, I gave more Edward. He's coming out more in the story now! So no more complaining. You have to be patient.**

**Don't forget to send love! I like love : )**

**Peace, love, Twilight,  
><strong>**Katie**


	7. Cowboy Casanova

**Voice font:** _Bella_ … **Alice and Rosalie**

**Album: Dear Jacob**

**Track #10: Cowboy Casanova**

**Cowboy Casanova**

_**Still Tuesday, October 26...**_

"You saw what?" Rosalie asked incredulously from the front seat of the Big Band Truck.

"Jacob was at a table with Angela Weber tonight," I repeated for about the millionth time.

"You cannot be serious," Alice said. "I thought he was all 'both of my girlfriends broke up with me on the same night and one of them has dissed me on numerous occasions in front of a live audience, woe is me.'"

"That's what I thought, too. But after a certain conversation we had the other day, I think he is trying to prove that statement wrong," I replied.

"And what did this certain conversation lead to?" Edward inquired with a raise of his eyebrow - an eyebrow whose perfection I have never noticed before.

"Did you kick his ass?" Emmett asked playfully. "Do you know how awesome it would be if you physically kicked that dog's butt instead of lyrically?" He looked hopefully at me through the rearview mirror.

I rolled my eyes. "I hate to be the dead battery in your drawer of hope, but no. Jacob was telling me that his life wasn't horribly miserable and he's going to get himself a new girlfriend to show me. Which will later lead to nothing good at all."

"But why Angela?" Rosalie asked, turning around in the passenger seat to look at me. "She's the last person I would see him with."

"I don't know," I replied. "And I'm worried about it."

Angela is so quiet and shy. She is very pretty, don't get me wrong, but not one to stand out - I don't think she even wants to. She is so very different from Jacob. Now that I think about it, I am like Angela, shy and reserved (off the stage, of course), and Jacob and I were together for two years. But just look where that ended up. This makes me even more worried about Angela. Jacob could hurt her so easily, break her heart so quick. I know he can, I have first hand experience.

"I have to talk to her, warn her about him," I said, thinking of when I pass her in the hallways, what classes I have with her.

"Who knows, maybe Jacob has cha-"

I groaned, cutting Jasper off. "Please don't give me the 'people can change' speech."

Jasper chuckled. "Okay, okay. I'm just trying to give you something positive to work with here."

"The only positive thing about this situation is the new song I'm coming up with right now. Someone toss me a notebook and pen."

_**Wednesday, October 27...**_

After searching the hallways for a while the next day at school, I finally spotted Angela at her locker.

"Hi, Angela," I said as I walked up to her.

We were kind of friends, more like that person you go to in a class that you have no other friends in. That's why Angela seemed a little surprised that I would come up and talk to her. But because she's Angela she greeted me with a warm smile.

"Um, hi, Bella. I saw you guys at The Rush last night, you sounded awesome."

I smiled. "Thanks, I saw you too."

The look on her face told me she knew exactly where this was going.

"Yeah, um, I know you guys just broke up, but he asked me and I just…" She seemed unsure, embarrassed even, like I caught her stealing a cookie from the cookie jar. "If you're… uncomfortable with it, Bella, I can-" It's just like Angela to care about what other people feel before herself.

I stopped her. "I'm not mad at you, Angela. But do you know what you're getting yourself into with Jacob?"

"What do you mean?"

"Do you know why we broke up?"

She gave me a weird look. "You don't need to go into specifics. Just because it didn't work out with you doesn't mean that it won't for us."

I sighed. This isn't working. "Yes, I understand that. But you should know that Jacob isn't all that he's cracked up to be, Angela. He-"

The warning bell cut me off.

Angela gasped. "Oh! I'm sorry, Bella, but I can't be late. We can talk later, okay?" She shut her locker door turned and was quickly walking down the hall before I could stop.

"Wait! Angela!" But she was already turning the corner.

Well. That didn't go quite as I'd hoped.

_**Saturday, October 30**_

I never saw Angela again to finish that talk. After three days I began to wonder if she was avoiding me. So I moved on to plan B. I've had lyrics spinning in my head for a while and now I can put them to good use. It's Saturday night so there's a pretty good chance that Jacob and Angela will be on another little rendezvous. And knowing Jacob, he will probably take her back to the same place. So here we are at Rush again. More specifically, the dressing room.

"Alice! Cool it with the glitter, it's getting in my eyes," I demanded as Alice swirled her brush in the eye shadow for the millionth time.

"If you would stop blinking so much it won't fall off."

"If you'd stop jabbing that brush in my eyes I wouldn't blink so much."

"Oh, calm down you two," Rosalie said while she adjusted her shiny necklace. "Now hurry up, we are on in seven."

"I'm almost done," Alice announced. "Just one more coat of lipstick."

I groaned and Rosalie chuckled. When Alice finally finished, I stood and smoothed out my purple, lacey tank top, brushing more excess glitter off of it.

We made our way to the stage when we were announced. I looked out onto the crowd while the others got their instruments situated. I saw Jacob and Angela sitting at a table by the wall. They were talking and laughing. Then Jacob saw me. His face went white. Angela looked up too; she gave me a shy smile and a wave.

I heard the music start playing; a steady, swaying beat from the drums. Then the guitar and fiddle joined along with Alice and Rosalie's voices.

**Oh whoa  
><strong>**Oh whoa  
><strong>**Oh whoa**

_You better take it from me,  
>That boy is like a disease<br>You're running, you're tired, you're trying to hide  
>And you're wondering why you can't get free<br>He's like a curse he's like a drug.  
>You get addicted to his love.<br>You wanna get out but he's holding you down  
><em>'_Cause you can't live without one more touch._

_He's a good time cowboy Casanova_  
><em>leaning up against the record machine<br>He looks like a cool drink of water but he's candy coated misery  
>He's the devil in disguise, a snake with blue eyes<br>__and he only comes out at night _  
><em>Gives you feelings that you don't wanna fight<br>You better run for your life _

**Oh whoa  
><strong>**Oh whoa  
><strong>**Oh whoa**_  
><em>

Jacob was throwing daggers with his eyes at me from his seat. Angela was shifting uncomfortably. She glanced from me to Jacob a couple times, as if she was trying to decide who was right. Then Jacob put his arm around her shoulder and he looked at me like he proving something. Angela relaxed at the contact; I could see her melt into him a little.

Not the direction I was hoping for.

_I see that look on your face, you ain't hearing what I say  
>So I'll say it again 'cause I've been where you've been<br>__and I know how it ends, you can't get away  
>Don't even look in his eyes, he'll tell you nothing but lies<br>And you wanna believe, but you won't be deceived  
><em>_If you listen to me and take my advice_

_He's a good time cowboy Casanova_  
><em>leaning up against the record machine <em>  
><em>He looks like a cool drink of water but he's candy coated misery<br>He's the devil in disguise, a snake with blue eyes  
><em>_and he only comes out at night  
>Gives you feelings that you don't wanna fight<br>You better run for your life _

**Oh whoa  
><strong>**Oh whoa  
><strong>**Oh whoa**

Now Jacob's hand was running up and down the skin of Angela's arm. Then it went past her shoulder, then to her jawbone. He leaned in and whispered something in hear, she smiled and answered back. His hand was still dancing on her arm, slowly making its way across her collarbone. 

_Run, run, run away don't let him mess with your mind_  
><em>He'll tell you anything you wanna hear<em>  
><em>He'll break your heart it's just a matter of time<em>  
><em>But just remember-<em>

_He's a good time cowboy Casanova_  
><em>leaning up against the record machine<br>He looks like a cool drink of water but he's candy coated misery  
>He's the devil in disguise, a snake with blue eyes<br>__and he only comes out at night  
>Gives you feelings that you don't wanna fight<br>You better run for your life_

_Oh you better run for your life,_  
><em>Oh you better run for your life<em>

The music abruptly ended with a strong strum from the guitars and clapping and cheers followed. I found Jacob and Angela again. They were holding hands, in happy conversation, seemingly oblivious to the world around them. I looked back at the rest of Golden Eyes. They were all waving back and smiling, normal end of show stuff. I was the only one unhappy with how it turned out. Alice nudged me, though, and gave me a sympathetic smile.

_We tried_, she mouthed.

That's not good enough.

I looked back at Jacob and Angela before we exited the stage; they looked like a happy new couple. But from sidelong glance Jacob directed at me, I knew in my gut that he hadn't changed at all.

_**Sunday, October 31... (yes it's Halloween, but we are just going to ignore it, and changing the date would screw up my well thought out calendar)**_

I pulled into the Cullen's driveway just after noon. Alice and Rosalie made plans to go shopping and pleaded with me to come along. Their plans most likely include tight-thighed jeans, short skirts, and push-up bras. More like a plan a plan of unmerciful torture if you ask me. But right now my life is begging for a distraction.

I walked up the front porch and opened the door that lead to their open living room. Emmett was lying on the couch playing a violent and loud video game. I came up behind the couch and poked him on the head.

"Hi, Emmett."

He looked up at me with a big Emmett smile. "Hey, Bells! They're still up upstairs tearing apart Alice's closet."

I laughed. "'Kay, I can wait."

"Edward is in the kitchen if you need any lunch."

"Alright. Oh, and watch out, a giant robot shooting rockets is coming at you."

"What? Oh shit!" Emmett jumped and quickly got back to his game, uttering more profanity as he nearly got trampled.

I made my way to the kitchen and found Edward cooking something at the stove on the massive, white marble island. He looked up when he heard me set my bag down. A big crooked smile lit up his face.

"Hey, I thought I heard you out there."

I smiled back. "What's that?" I asked, pointing to the pan.

"Lunch."

"Okay, more specifically?"

"Last night's leftovers of Esme's very best fish fry," he answered as he slid it onto a plate. "Would you like to try it?"

I scrunched my nose up. "I'm not a very big fan of fish. This of course is difficult with a fish fanatic father."

"I bet I could persuade you to like it. What don't you like about fish?"

"I don't know. It just tastes… fishy." I didn't realize how stupid that sounded until it left my mouth. I felt the heat rise to my cheeks.

Edward snorted. "Yeah, okay. That makes sense." He speared a piece with his fork and held it up. "Come on, one bite. You'll love it."

"Fine. But it better not taste fishy."

"What a horrible thing to put on a fish! _You better not taste fishy!_"

I rolled my eyes and leaned over the counter to reach the fork. As my lips left the tines, our eyes met and I couldn't look away. It was like there was suddenly this powerful force that kept my gaze locked on his. We were so close, just inches apart, only an empty fork's length between us. _Have his eyes always been such a sparkling green?_

I could feel something surging between us. Something tingling and unfamiliar. It made my stomach churn in an uncomfortable and exciting way. I wondered if Edward could feel it too, or if it was just my delusional mind. But because it seemed that neither of us could tear our eyes away from the others, I got the feeling that he did.

Suddenly, Edward pulled back and looked down, becoming very engrossed in his fingers. I straightened and realized I hadn't been breathing throughout that whole exchange. What was that exchange? I took a shaky breath through my nose.

Edward coughed and broke the awkward silence. "So, um… did you like it?"

Wait, like what? That thing that just happened? I don't even know what it was! What am I supposed to say? Then I felt the piece of fish that was still in my mouth. I quickly swallowed it. Right, did I like the fish. However, I forget to taste it during that… what ever it was.

"Um, yeah… it was… it was good."

"Good."

"Mmm-hmm."

Insert awkward silence here.

"So um… I'm going to go… eat this now," Edward said, trying to make this normal again. "Have fun shopping."

"Okay, thanks," I replied.

He didn't move for moment. It looked like he was going to say something, but then he stopped and quickly fled the room.

A couple seconds later I heard a shriek come from the direction of the staircase.

"Edward! Slow down and watch where you're going! You almost got fish all over my new shirt!" That would be Alice's shriek.

I heard him mumble a quick sorry.

Alice came into the kitchen and grabbed her purse that was sitting on the counter.

"Bella! I need your honest opinion. Is the purple eye shadow too much? Is it overwhelming?"

"No, you look great." Is just me or is my voice still shaking?

She smiled broadly. "Good, because I don't really want to redo it. You ready?"

"Yup, let's go!"

_**Later…**_

"Okay, what do you think of this one?" Rosalie said as she strutted out of the dressing room in a deep purple dress. "Does it look too tight in the hips? It doesn't feel like it but I can't decide if looks it… What about the straps, do you like the straps, Bella? Bella? Yoo hoo! Come back, Bells."

A hand was suddenly waving right in front of my face, snapping me out of a trance. No, not a trance of utter boredom back here in this little hall of clothing claustrophobia. I was lost in my thoughts; I couldn't stop thinking about what happened in the kitchen with Edward. I still don't understand what it was. Ugh! I went on this shopping trip as a distraction and here I am, with another mind consuming issue because of said shopping trip. Well, very loosely because of this shopping trip.

"Sorry, Rose. It looks great."

She sighed. "Are you sure? You've said that about all of them. Come on, give me something to work with here!"

To be honest, I couldn't recall what a single item of clothing either of them have come out with looked like.

"Okay, um… the beading on the neckline is a bit much." I think… I'm not that educated in clothing etiquette.

"Hmm, you're right. Alice, I'm ditching the purple dress!" She called out.

Alice poked her head out of the neighboring stall. "Oh, good call."

My stomach chose that moment to let out a growl. "Are we almost done here? I'm getting a little a hungry."

"Yup," Alice replied. "I've just got five more things."

"Six," Rosalie said as she closed the door of her dressing room.

I internally groaned. Great, that means more time for my thoughts to bombard me with confusing questions that I'd rather not deal with.

Three skirts and a handful of sparkly tank tops later, I decided to just ignore the little confrontation with Edward. Pretend it never even happed. Hopefully, he will too and we won't have anymore awkward situations. I'd still like to know what it was though, why I was so pulled into his emerald eyes, why that tingling sensation popped up out of nowhere. Stop it, Bella! Just forget it, it never happened.

Thankfully, both Alice and Rosalie emerged from their stalls then with armfuls of clothing.

"Come on, Bella, we're going to go check out now," Alice said as she balanced the pile in her tiny arms.

Because of their excessive amount of clothing, the checkout process was a little lengthy. I tried to be a part of the small talk to keep my mind from wandering to undesired places.

Suddenly, loud music erupted, breaking the calmness of the store. A shriek came from nearly everyone in the room. Including a particularly loud one from me.

"Sorry, everybody!" Rosalie said as she pulled her phone out and hit ignore.

"Good Lord, Rosalie. Would put that thing on vibrate?" I hissed at her.

"I don't like putting it on vibrate. It looks like its having little seizures," she replied and took the bags off the counter.

Alice and I just rolled our eyes and laughed.

_**Later…**_

A half hour later, we sat on a metal bench eating our ice cream snack out side the Dairy Queen on the top floor. It was right across from the little movie theater the mall had.

While Alice and Rose debated on where to go next, I ate my cookie dough blizzard and read a poster for a new movie coming out. Unfortunately, a couple came out of theater two started a heated make out session right in front of said poster. Gross. I wanted to yell at them to move but didn't because… well because I'm me.

But before I moved on to find a new poster, something caught my eye. The shirt the guy was wearing looked whole lot like one I bought for a certain birthday three months ago. And I recognized that paint splatter on the jeans. You have got to be kidding me.

"Bella?" Alice said and put her hand on my shoulder. "What are you looking… Oh my God."

I stood up and shoved my blizzard at Alice, ready to waltz over there and smack that boy to Timbucktoo. "That two-faced son of a-"

"Bella! Calm down and get your butt back over here," Rosalie demanded. When I didn't move, she grabbed my wrist and pulled me back down onto the bench.

"Wait, didn't you say he and Angela have a date tonight?" Alice questioned.

"Sure do."

I could almost hear the gears grinding in their minds trying to come up with a reasonable explanation so I wouldn't freak out.

"You never know," Rosalie said in an attempt to cool me down. "He might have ended it with Angela so he could go out with… this… lovely young lady." Lovely young lady my butt, she had so much makeup on it looked like she was wearing a mask. "Because now he knows that cheating is wrong."

All I could do was stare furiously at the two eating each others' faces off while steam poured out of my ears. I didn't believe it. He hasn't changed. Not one bit. He's still the lying jerk he was in the first place. He always will be.

* * *

><p><strong>Song notes: Cowboy Cassanova is by Carrie Underwood.<strong>

**Yay! A long one! And I got it up pretty quick.**

**Here comes more Edward! He will be in the story a lot more veryveryvery soon! Yay for Edward!**

**Comment comment comment! Please? I like love.**

**Peace, love, Twilight,  
><strong>**Katie**


	8. Best Days of Your Life

**Shoot. That was a long time again. I changed the summary to this story, I like it a lot better. Check it out and tell me what you think.**

* * *

><p><strong>Voice font: <strong>_Bella_ …  
><strong>Album: Dear Jacob<br>****Track #11: Songs Like This  
><strong>**Track #12: Best Days Of Your Life**

**Best Days Of Your Life**

_**Still Sunday, October 31...**_

We left the mall as soon as the volcano explosions in my head ceased, or at least calmed down. Minusculey. I called Angela on the way back, telling her to meet me at my house, that I had something important to tell her. It went straight to voice mail, though. I left her a message, praying that she would get it.

As soon as Rosalie stopped her car in the Cullen's driveway, I grabbed my one bag (we went to Barnes & Nobel), said a quick goodbye and hopped into my truck, peeling out of the driveway. When I got to my house, Angela was already sitting on the door step. She was staring at her phone. I opened the car door and got out of the truck, hurrying over to Angela. I could see a strange expression on her face.

"Angela, I have to tell you something. Jacob-"

"I know," she said, cutting me off, still staring at her phone. "Jessica sent me a picture."

She held her phone out to me. I took it and found out what had her so engrossed. Jacob and Miss Make Up kissing in front of the movie poster. I felt even worse for her now, what a horrible way to find out.

"Oh, Angela." I sat down next to her and put my arm around her thin shoulders. I could hear her whimpering and saw a tear slide down her cheek. "Hey, at least you hadn't been in a relationship with the guy for two years." She sniffled and the tears started coming faster from her now bloodshot eyes. "I know, it still sucks."

"I just- I just feel so stupid!" She cried. "You tried to warn me but I didn't listen. I was too caught up in the fact that a cute boy had actually asked me out, hardly even caring that I barley knew him."

"Angela, don't blame yourself, it's not your fault. You were blinded by love. We both were," I said to her. "He's just not worth the tears. Trust me, I know."

She smiled and wiped her tear stained cheek with the back of her hand. "Thanks, Bella." I smiled back and squeezed her shoulders. She sat up a little straighter, her eyes a little clearer. "So, um, what do I do now? Should I go break up with him?"

That's when I hatched a devious little plan. "Well, you could, or you could wait a little and really get him hard." She gave me a confused look. "Cancel your date with him tonight, tell him you have an emergency baby sitting job or something. Then meet me here at six."

_**Later…**_

When Angela left, I ran up to my room and dug out my song journal, scribbling lyrics and notes onto the paper. About an hour later, Angela texted me saying that she canceled her date with Jacob. I called the others to let them in on my plan. When Edward picked up the phone, the conversation was just shy of almost awkward. He thankfully didn't say anything about earlier today. I had successfully tucked that little incident into a drawer and locked it shut, saving it to take out who knows when.

Angela arrived promptly at six o'clock. We got into my truck and drove over to the Cullen's house. I could tell that Angela was a bit nervous about all of this. She wouldn't stop bouncing her legs and her fingers were apparently very enjoyable to fidget with.

I turned to her when we pulled into the Cullen's driveway. "Calm down, Angela. You are going to have fun. I promise." She gave me a smile that said: _I want to believe you, but I'm not sure if do._

I pulled over to the side when we came up to the house and cut the engine. Angela was gaping at her first sight of the mansion the Cullen family calls home.

"Oh my word…" She said quietly as she slowly opened the passenger door and stepped onto the pavement, her eyes roaming over every inch of the house.

I chuckled. "Quite the place isn't it?" Angela just nodded.

I heard a car door slam shut to the right and saw Emmett walking towards us from the garage with his big Emmett smile painted on his face.

"Bellsie!" He shouted and gathered me in a bear hug, lifting my feet well of the ground. I laughed and hugged him back. After putting me safely back on the ground, he said, "I just finished loading up the Big Band Truck. Alice and Eddie are fighting in the living room."

I rolled my eyes. "Ah, of course." Not out of the ordinary for them. They fight a lot, but would gladly kill anyone who ever hurt the other.

Then Emmett turned to Angela - who, by the way, looked a tad bit frightened by this goliath of a man.

"I'm Emmett, the fun one," he said with his big Emmett grin.

"Oh, um, it's uh, nice to meet you," Angela replied, holding her hand out. Instead of taking it, Emmett pulled her in for hug and Angela's eyes bulged with surprise. I giggled.

The front door slammed behind us and I turned to see Edward walk down the porch stairs. I pushed away the little flip of my stomach. He smiled when he saw the three of us and came to stand by me. I was pretty sure that he also was pretending that little thing never happened by the way he acted so calm and not jittery. Either that or he is really good at hiding that sort of thing.

"This," Emmett said, gesturing to Edward, "is Edward, the brooding and horribly stubborn one."

Edward glared at him. "Thank you for that wonderful introduction." Then he turned to Angela with a dazzling smile. "Hello, I'm Edward, nice to meet you."

Angela was blushing. "Hi," she said quietly and gave a little wave.

"Well, as lovely as this little welcome is, we have to get going to pick up Rose and Jasper," Emmett announced. "ALICE! GET YOUR LITTLE BUTT OUT HERE! WE HAVE TO GO!"

Angela jumped as Edward and I both rolled our eyes.

"BE PATIENT YOU BIG OAF, I CAN'T FIND MY PURSE!" Alice screamed from in the house.

"Come on, Angela, we'll show you the Truck and get you away from the screaming buffoon," I said.

"Em, give me the keys," Edward said. Emmett turned around with a perfectly pleasant look on his face and dug in his pocket. He dropped the keys in Edward's hand.

"There you go, bro."

"Thanks."

Then he turned back around and became impatient Emmett again. "WELL HURY UP! OUR GIG IS MORE IMPORTANT THAN YOUR PURSE!"

_**Later…**_

"Are you positive I won't mess this up?" Angela asked for the billionth time as we finished getting ready backstage at Rush. She was fidgeting with her fingers again, something I have realized is a nervous habit of hers.

Rosalie adjusted a clip in Angela's inky black hair. "You'll do fine. You will get a rush of adrenaline and blow the roof off the place."

"You sure? I'm not really a roof blowing person."

I gave her a warm smile for encouragement. "Just calm down and you will do great."

"It's time ladies," Edward told us as he came up behind me. He rested his hand on my shoulder and it sent a jolt down my spine. _Just tuck it away._

A small squeak came from Angela. I turned to her. "Do you remember your cue?" She nodded. "Do you remember what to do?" She nodded. "Then you will do awesome." She didn't nod. "Remember why you are doing this."

I heard the announcer's voice boom out of the speakers. "Please welcome to the stage, Golden Eyes!" The crowd cheered and I got that rush of excitement I get every time we are about to go on stage. I looked behind me one last time before turning the corner in front of the curtain. Angela's face seemed less tight and I'm pretty sure she stopped shaking. I walked to the center of the stage and found Jacob with his tongue down Miss Makeup's throat. It was really a lovely sight, I'm sure they are madly in lust.

"Hello, everybody!" Jacob's head snapped up. "This is for a certain someone one out there who made me very mad a while ago and just recently quite furious."

Alice's fingers danced on her banjo strings making a repetitive melody. I clapped along with the fast beat.

_Wanna find some boy, rip his heart right out  
><em>_First man I see, gonna take him down  
><em>_It ain't the Christian thing to do they say  
><em>_But someone some where's gotta pay _

_And if it wasn't for guys like you  
><em>_There wouldn't be songs like this  
><em>_And if you hadn't gone and done me wrong  
><em>_I wouldn't go off like this  
><em>_Yeah, even I'm surprised  
><em>_How easy sweet revenge rolls off my lips  
><em>_If it wasn't for guys like you  
><em>_There wouldn't be songs like this_

_Broke my TV, pawned my guitar  
><em>_After maxing out, my credit card  
><em>_You lied much to much, and you lied again  
><em>_Caught you on the couch with my best friend_

_And if it wasn't for guys like you  
><em>_There wouldn't be songs like this  
><em>_And if you hadn't gone and done me wrong  
><em>_I wouldn't go off like this  
><em>_Yeah, even I'm surprised  
><em>_How easy sweet revenge rolls off my lips  
><em>_If it wasn't for guys like you  
><em>_There wouldn't be _

_Songs like this one  
><em>_That tell the whole world  
><em>_Just what a jerk you are_

I held out that last note loud and long then let Emmett have his beloved guitar solo. At the end of it, when he was leading up to my reentry, I said, "ladies and gentlemen, please give a warm welcome to Angela Weber!"

**And if it wasn't for guys like you  
><strong>**There wouldn't be song like this  
><strong>**And if you hadn't gone and done me wrong  
><strong>**I wouldn't go off like this**

I was wonderfully surprised at Angela's voice. I knew she was going to be good but I didn't expect _that_. She had an incredible amount of confidence that came from God knows where. Her voice was strong and right on tune as she moved with the music.

I found Jacob staring dumbfounded in his seat. If his jaw dropped any lower it would rip right off. I would also suggest dunking his head in a bucket of ice, those little volcanoes were going off again.

Angela and I stood side by side and sang the rest of the song to our dear friend together.

_**Yeah, even I'm surprised  
><strong>__**How easy sweet revenge rolls off my lips  
><strong>__**If it wasn't for guys like you  
><strong>__**There wouldn't be  
><strong>__**No, if it wasn't for guys like you  
><strong>__**There wouldn't be songs like this**_

When the music stopped, we clasped hands and took a bow together. I don't think I have ever seen Angela smile so big. When you are going through a heartbreak, that's a good feeling to have. Trust me, I know.

_**Later…**_

I sat at a table on the edge of the room munching on some very salty chips and watching Alice, Rosalie, and Angela dance their little hearts out. It's amazing how outgoing Angela can be once you crack her shell. I suppose she is like me that way. Put her on a stage with a microphone and some music and let her shine. God, these chips are salty, I need a drink.

"Would someone like a Cherry Coke in a glass - with ice - filled three quarters of the way full because that is all she drink before she acquires a nasty headache that is painful for us all?" I smiled at Edward's voice.

"It's like you read my mind." I greedily reached for the beverage and took a large gulp. _Ahh, sweet salinity relief._ I looked up at Edward with an eyebrow raised. "Three quarters, huh?" He gave me that crooked smile that made melt inside a little. I flashed back to that moment when - _stop it!_ I shook my head to clear it and focused on the present where that never happened.

"I've been known to pay attention."

"Well, thank you for that. I really needed this. I thought my mouth was going to dry up."

Edward laughed. "Anytime."

There was a moment of silence between us. I looked back to crowd of dancers, finding the three girls still laughing and having a great time. I smiled at them, once again feeling happy that Angela can forget about what Jacob did to her, if only for a short time.

"What you did for Angela was really great, Bella," Edward murmured, I could barely hear him above the music. I looked back at him and was a little surprised at what I saw. A very intense expression was painted on his face, and there was a look in his eyes that I couldn't quite interpret. I could feel the heat creeping up my cheeks from his intense gaze.

"Um, thanks."

His hand slid across the table and his fingers gently wrapped around mine. I felt a tingle and a whole parade of acrobats in my stomach. _We have held hands before, why is this happening?_ "What you can do you with music is really something special." My breath hitched.

Our gazes met and I felt that pull again, that unbreakable current coursing between us. I couldn't look away. It was that tingling sensation again, the one I had never felt before, the one that was strange and exiting. And just like last time, it scared me to death. But this time I pulled away.

Edward looked startled when I quickly sat as far back as my chair would allow. He slowly moved backward, his expression unreadable. I'm sure mine was clearly filled with shock and fright. And probably very pale, a stark contrast to the usual freakish blush. I had to get out of here.

"I, um, I gotta go-gotta go to the uh, bathroom. Yeah, I-I gotta use the bathroom." I abruptly stood, nearly tipping the chair over.

Edward cleared his throat. "Uh, okay."

I clumsily moved out from seat, almost taking the table with me this time. I'm sure that tomato hue is back on my face. I gave him an awkward little wave and quickly turned around to avoid further embarrassment. My face was so hot you could fry a large egg on it. I squeezed between sweaty, dancing bodies while trying not to get knocked over on my way to the other side of the room where the bathrooms are. When I was finally at the edge of the swaying throng of the scantily clad mass of people, someone bumped into me, sending me into a person near the bar. Half of his drink sloshed out of his cup.

"Hey!"

"Oh! I'm so sorry, someone ran into me and-," then I actually looked at the person I collided with. Of course. In my life, who else could it possibly be? "Huh, I guess I take back that sorry for something of such minor consequence in this situation."

"How did you know?"

I scoffed at him, seething anger building inside me once again. "How did I know. That is seriously what you are asking me? How did I know that you were cheating on Angela. Don't you think a groveling apology is a little more appropriate? Or maybe 'I now realize that I am an immoral, lying jerk and need to figure out my life.' Honestly, which one sounds better?"

He scowled. "I just wish you would stop singing those damn songs about it."

"Oh, good Lord," I said exasperatedly. "You keep doing it, though! Haven't you figured it out yet? Why do you even do it, go after these bottle blonds with fake tans?"

He looked sheepishly over his shoulder, looking at the bar. There was a woman sitting on the bar, her sparkly dress hiked up to very top of her thighs, a beer in hand and lips locked on a guy in a bar stool. That right there would be the lovely lady that was so lucky to come here with Jacob tonight.

"Mmm, she's a keeper for sure," I mockingly told him. His face got red and he looked away.

"She's just a little drunk, that's all." Yeah, sure, _that's all_.

"Ha! Just a little. I'm sure you two are very happy together." I patted him on the shoulder, hoping my sarcasm was getting to him. "I think I'm starting to figure your little cheating problem out."

"What?"

"Yup. You have commitment issues," I stated simply. "You just don't have the strength to commit to one girl at a time. And in turn, you go for the girls with commitment issues. It's never you cheating on a nice girl with a nice girl, you are cheating on a nice girl with one of those girls." I pointed to Miss Makeup on the bar.

Jacob looked appalled. "Commitment issues? I do not have commitment issues. I was with you for two years." At least he's _trying_ to defend himself.

"Are you sure that's the example you want to provide?" His face fell as he realized what he said. "Has it ever occurred to you that you are stuck with these girls now? Unless you can get your act together you are going to be doing this for the rest of your life." He had the nerve to look confused. "You are going to find a nice girl and then say 'oh wait, I don't want to be stuck with her for my entire life!' Then you go out and find your self another girlfriend, one who wont care, one who wont be there forever. And you will-"

"Just stop!" He interrupted with. He put his palms up and looked at me with quite an angry expression. "I just need you to fucking stop. Stop showing up in life and throwing your crap at me. I need you to get out of my head."

I shook my head and smiled at him. "Uh-uh, you know very well that that is not going to happen. You will never forget me. Every time you cheat on someone, every time you lose another girlfriend, or fling, or whatever short-lived thing you've got going, you will always go right back to me. The love we shared, you deciding it was a good idea to cheat on me, you losing the best relationship you ever had. Whenever you think about the life you have now, you will think about the life you had with me."

_'Cause I'll be there in the back of your mind  
>From the day we met till you were making me cry<br>And it's just too bad you've already had the best days  
>The best days of your life<em>

"Wait, wait, wait! Don't you start singing, I don't need two songs in one day!" I just ignored him.

_Ain't it a shame_  
><em>A shame that every time you hear my name<em>  
><em>Brought up in a casual conversation<em>  
><em>You can't think straight?<em>

_And ain't it sad_  
><em>You can't forget about what we had<em>  
><em>Take a look at her and do you like what you see<em>  
><em>Or do you wish it was me?<em>

_I'll be there in the back of your mind_  
><em>From the day we met to the very last night<em>  
><em>And it's just too bad you've already had the best days<em>  
><em>The best days of your life<em>

_And does she know_  
><em>Know about the times you used to hold me<em>  
><em>Wrapped me in your arms and how you told me<em>  
><em>I'd be the only one?<em>

_I heard about  
><em>_Yeah, someone told me once when you were out  
>She went a little crazy, ran her mouth about me<br>Ain't jealousy funny?_

_'Cause I'll be there in the back of your mind_  
><em>From the day we met to the very last night<em>  
><em>And it's just too bad you've already had the best days<em>  
><em>The best days of your<br>__  
>Life with me was a fairytale love<br>I was head over heels till you threw away us  
>And it's just too bad you've already had the best days<br>The best days of your life_

_I heard you're gonna get married, have a nice little family  
>Live out my dreams with someone new<br>But I've been told that a cheater is always a cheater  
>So I've got my pride and she's got you<em>

_'Cause I'll be there in the back of your mind_  
><em>From the day we met till you were making me cry<em>  
><em>And it's just too bad you've already had the best days<em>  
><em>The best days of your life<em>

_Of your life, oh, oh yeah_  
><em>You're gonna think of me<em>  
><em>You're gonna think of me in your life<em>  
><em>Oh, oh yeah<em>

_It's a shame, it's a shame_  
><em>It's a shame, it's a shame<em>  
><em>It's a shame, it's a shame<em>

"Bye-bye, Jacob. I hope you have a nice rest of your life."

I spun on my heels and headed out the door leaving a dumbfounded Jacob staring after me. I was officially ready to put him behind me.

* * *

><p><strong>Song notes: Songs Like This is by Carrie Underwood, Best Days of Your Life is by Kellie Pickler<strong>

**I didn't put in the entire voice font note at the beginning because I didn't want to spoil the surprise, I'm sure you were able to figure it out.**

**The next chapter is gonna be really good. I think a lot of you will get very excited! **

**Tell me what you thought, i like love :D**

**Peace, love, and Twilight,  
>Katie<strong>


	9. Kiss the Girl

**Did you notice how fast that was? Pretty cool, huh. This is a fun one. Promise.**

* * *

><p><strong>Voice font: <strong>_Sebastian_** ( :D )  
><strong>**Album: Walls  
><strong>**Track #1: Kiss the Girl**

Kiss the Girl

_**Thursday, November 4... **_**Emmett POV**

"Go, go, go! C'mon, you can do it! Faster! _Faster!_ NO!" The screen went black. Who in this world is sick enough to make the TV screen go black at a time like this! Well, actually I can think of few… but that's a different story.

"There are more important things going on in the world right now than baseball." Of course. The over-caffeinated pixie I call sister.

"Alice! Why would do that? We were about to win!" I spun around on the couch and gave her my best mad face. Her annoyed face was better, though.

"Do you think I care? We have a more pressing issue to deal with."

"And what, dare I ask, would that be?" With Alice, this was sometimes a frightening question to ask.

"Edward and Bella's love life," she said simply.

I fell back onto the couch and threw my hands over my face. "Oh for the love God!"

"I'm serious! Have you seen the way Edward looks at her? That boy is so in love." She started pacing. _Pacing!_ I thought people only did that on TV.

"Well duh! Everyone knows that."

She stopped in her tracks and pointed at me. "Everyone but Bella." Then she started pacing again.

I sighed. "I suppose that's why you have interrupted the game."

"You are exactly right."

I reached to the coffee table for the remote, thinking I could maybe get the game back on while she's pacing and tapping her lip - a nervous habit of hers. The pacing, not the lip tapping. The lip tapping is new.

"Drop it!" Shoot.

"Ugh! Would you just leave them alone. They can figure out their issues on their own."

She threw her hands up in the air, never a good sign. "No! They obviously are not capable of showing their feelings. Especially with Bella's current predicament. And if it works, think of the great speech I could give at their wedding!"

"You would give a speech at their wedding even if they told you not to."

"That's beside the point." If she keeps this up there will be a rut in the floor. Esme would not be happy.

"Okay… What if-"

"That's it. I'm coming up blank. I'll call Rosalie. She'll think of with something." She flipped her phone out and marched to the stairs, dialing Rose's number.

"But how about we-"

"Shh! I'm thinking!"

I rolled my eyes and turned the TV back on.

_**Later…**_

Half an hour later, Rosalie, Jasper, Alice and I sat in the sparkly pink room of my beloved sister, conjuring up ways to bring the two stubborn love birds together. It was really a lot of fun. Yup. I laid on the floor tossing a fluffy pink pillow in the air. Rosalie's feet rested on my stomach while she laid back on the edge of the bed. Jasper leaned against the chair, yet another pink item of furniture. And Alice sat cross-legged in the middle of the room, her face all scrunched up in deep concentration. She also looked like she was holding in gas.

"Come on, guys. We need something creative, something they won't see coming. We all know what will happen if they catch on too early; they will just pull away and bring us five steps back." Alice has said that at least seven times already and it has gotten us absolutely nowhere.

I decided to just throw something out there. "Let's just think here. What is a common theme in their lives right now?" They all looked at me like they were shocked I was even paying attention. "Anyone? No? Okay, well, at the moment music seems to occur a lot."

Jasper rolled his eyes. "Emmett, they are in a band. Music is a always a common theme."

"Then it will work perfectly. We should be able to easily reach them through song."

Rosalie sat up and looked down at me. "But how are we going to come up with a song that says it just right thing in a short amount of time?" She asked. "That's Bella's talent, not ours."

"We are just going to have to find one that's already been written, then," Alice decided.

Well, shoot. Now we are back where we started.

Jasper sighed. "What's wrong with locking them in a room together and not letting them out until they have declared their undying love for each other?"

"That," Rosalie said and pointed at Jasper, "is a wonderful idea. Much easier. Let's do it."

"Wait!" I yelled, glad I could come up with something quick so that boring and cliché route does not become a reality. "I have an idea."

_**Friday, November 5...**_

There's nothing quite like watching popcorn kernels explode in the microwave. If we had more popcorn in the house it could easily become one of my favorite pastimes. That and watching Edward squirm while executing a well planned and thought out scheme that revolves around him. However, this one's not as well planned and thought out as others, we are winging a lot of it. It's nothing like that one thing we did to him freshman year that took nearly five months to sort out and quick thinking to avoid the police and possible death row when-

"Do I smell popcorn?" Edward asked as the front door slammed shut.

Let the games begin.

I ran out of the kitchen and into the foyer. "Surprise! We are bringing guys' movie night back!" I threw my arms in the air to make it seem more exciting.

Jasper looked behind him at us from the couch he was sitting on. "Hey," he said to Edward. He ruined the excitement.

Edward's brow raised, looking mildly shocked. I was hoping for excessively shocked then a lot of enthusiasm, but this will do. We used to have a guys' movie night every Friday until we started performing most Fridays. So this was the perfect, unpredictable, initiated motivator we were looking for.

"Okay, sure. What movie are we watching?"

"It's a surpriiiise!" I answered in a singsong voice.

"Why do I feel like there are going to be a lot of surprises today?"

_**Later…**_

After we had a nutritious dinner of pizza and waffle fries, we gathered in the living room to let the festivities of guys night commence. I stood in front of the other two who were on the couch, ready to present to them the movie that will hopefully forever change our lives for the better by making Edward a less depressing person.

"Now that we have our snacks to enhance our movie watching enjoyment, it is time to announce the movie of choice for tonight's guys' movie night!" Wow. There was an excessive amount of the word 'movie' in that sentence.

"I don't remember this being quite so dramatic in the past," Edward said.

"It's the first movie night in a long time. It has to be dramatic," I replied.

"Right."

"Anyways… I have chosen, for our masculine movie enjoyment-"

"You sure are stressing the _guy's_ night aspect," Edward interrupted.

"Shh! I have chosen… The Little Mermaid!" I exclaimed, trying to look as excited as I could. It doesn't matter that this is an attempt to improve the life of my brother. I'm not still not thrilled about sitting through a Disney princess movie. And by the looks of it, neither is Edward.

His eyes widened and his jaw dropped. He almost looked a little panicky, like watching this just might kill him. "Hey, um, I think it's Jasper's turn to pick the movie," he said, trying to sound cool and calm. _Like he even remembers who chose the last movie._

I groaned. "Fine. Jasper, pick a movie."

I gave him a pointed look. "I, uh…" His eyes glanced at the movie cabinet for a beat. I glared at him. Don't you be thinking you can get out of this; Alice will kill me. "The Little Mermaid."

Edward groaned and threw his head back. I nodded approvingly at Jasper who rolled his eyes. Then I turned and put the movie in and pressed play. I flopped down on the coach between them and put my feet up on the ottoman.

"Let's get this party started!"

Edward groaned again. It's for your own good, buddy.

_**Earlier today…**_** Edward POV**

I almost did it. It nearly happened this time. I actually got in the car, pulled out of the garage and turned onto the street this time. But I just couldn't bring myself to stop at her driveway, my foot wouldn't move off the pedal and the car kept right on rolling. I stopped at the other end of street and just sat there, feeling like an idiot. I looked behind me out the back window and saw the roof top of Bella's house. I can do this. Just start the car and turn around, walk up to her front door and- my hand fell from the keys in the ignition. I can't.

"Ugh!" I leaned my head against the headrest and rubbed my eyes with my fists.

_Stop being such coward, Edward!_

But what if she says no? What if she doesn't feel the same? What if I scare her? What if I have no chance now because of Jacob? What if she gets mad? What if I ruin the relationship we have had since we were four?

_What if._ Those words can kill a man.

I sighed and turned the key then pulled away from the curb, heading out of the neighborhood streets. I turned on Debussy, hoping it would distract me from my most recent failure. That of course didn't work when Claire de Lune came on, Bella's favorite song. I pictured her sitting in the passenger seat beside me. Her feet tapping the beat up on the dashboard, eyes closed in delight. The light from the sunset making her face glow a beautiful gold and bringing out the red streaks in her hair. Her lips forming a pretty smile on her pretty face. I was so lost in thoughts of her, I nearly missed our hidden driveway.

I pulled into the garage and cut the engine, but not all the way, just enough to keep the radio on. I listened to Debussy a little longer. I pressed the back button to start Claire de Lune over, I wanted to spend a little more time with my gold-skinned, foot tapping Bella.

God, I'm pathetic.

Sighing, I turned the car all the way off, Debussy disappearing along with my gold-skinned Bella. I got out and slammed the door shut. I could sense the impending Emmett related chaos before I even entered the house.

"Do I smell popcorn?"

Emmett ran out from the kitchen with a look of extreme excitement that scared me just a bit. His arms shot above his head and he yelled, "Surprise! We are bringing guys' movie night back!" Crap, I was right. There is defiantly Emmett-chaos waiting to ensue and release all of its energy capable of annihilation.

Jasper turned his head around to look at me from his seat on the couch. "Hey." Emmett scowled at him.

My eyebrows raised at this sudden and unexpected proclamation. But hey, why not? I shrugged and answered, "Okay, sure. What movie are we watching?"

"It's a surprise!" Uh-oh, that answer is never good with Emmett.

I turned to Jasper. "Why do I feel like there are going to be a lot of surprises today?"

_**Later…**_

About forty-five minutes later, Jasper and I were on the couch watching Emmett declare, quite theatrically, what we will be watching.

"Now that we have our snacks to enhance our movie watching enjoyment, it is time to announce the movie of choice for tonight's guys' movie night!" I'm pretty sure his face if going to explode out of this wild excitement. He never got this excited with past movie nights, there must be something going on.

"I don't remember this being quite so dramatic in the past," I said.

He sighed. "It's the first movie night in a long time. It has to be dramatic."

"Right."

"Anyways… I have chosen, for our masculine movie enjoyment-"

"You sure are stressing the _guys'_ night aspect," I interrupted. He shot me an annoyed look that made him look like one of those stress relievers that have the eyes that bulge out. It was one of his more entertaining facial expressions.

"Shh! I have chosen…" He added a dramatic pause. "The Little Mermaid!"

What now? Is he seriously choosing to watch The Little Mermaid? I thought it was _guys'_ night. I'm pretty sure _I_ looked like the stress reliever now. _Okay, think quick, Edward. How are you getting out of this one?_ "Hey, um, I think it's Jasper's turn to pick out the movie." It's a long-shot, but maybe it will work.

Emmett groaned. "Fine. Jasper, pick a movie."

"I, uh…" Come on Jasper, don't bail on me now. He peered at the movies. Yes! Emmett glared at him. "The Little Mermaid." Shoot.

I groaned and tossed my head back onto the top of the couch. I felt the middle of couch sink in as Emmett threw himself between Jasper and I. He pressed play and rubbed his hands together. "Let's get this party started!"

Something must be going on. There is absolutely no way that Mr. Football Star-violent video games-all things manly are holy Emmett would willingly chose to watch a Disney princess movie on one of our free Friday nights. It basically goes against nature. So there is defiantly something more to this whole surprise movie night and even more surprising movie choice.

_**During the movie…**_

I'll admit it. This wasn't so bad. There were parts that still made me chuckle and smile. It also brought back some good childhood memories. Memories of sleepovers that lasted more than one night, being forced to be the prince while the girls were the princesses and secretly enjoying it, and when Disney movies were the coolest things in world. That was back when there were no complicated relationships or cheating boyfriends or feelings that scared the shit out you. It was so much easier back then.

We were at the part where Eric and Ariel were on their boat ride. It was Bella's favorite part of the movie, I'm pretty sure she still has the song on her iPod. I saw both Emmett and Jasper peer at me from the corners of their eyes as the boat went into the tree canopy. I didn't know why and it was kind of strange. They looked at me again when Sebastian started singing.

_Percussion  
>Strings<br>Winds  
>Words<em>

There you see her  
>Sitting there across the way<br>She don't got a lot to say  
>But there's something about her<br>And you don't know why  
>But you're dying to try<br>You wanna kiss the girl

Yes, you want her  
>Look at her, you know you do<br>It's possible she wants you, too  
>There is one way to ask her<br>It don't take a word  
>Not a single word<br>Go on and kiss the girl

Sing with me now  
>Sha-la-la-la-la-la<br>My, oh, my  
>Look at the boy too shy<br>He ain't gonna kiss the girl  
>Sha-la-la-la-la-la<br>Ain't that sad  
>Ain't it shame, too bad<br>You gonna miss the girl

I get where you're coming from here, Eric. But, come on, man up and kiss her! You have a limited amount of time, you are going to lose her. They looked at me again, longer this time.

_Now's your moment  
>Floating in a blue lagoon<br>Boy, you better do it soon  
>No time will be better<br>She don't say a word  
>And she won't say a word <em>_  
><em>_Until you kiss the girl _

You almost had it, you could've done it, but you chickened out and know it's awkward. How is she going to want to kiss you now?

Sha-la-la-la-la-la  
>Don't be scared<br>You got the mood prepared  
>Go on and kiss the girl<br>Sha-la-la-la-la-la  
>Don't stop now<br>Don't try to hide it how  
>You wanna kiss the girl<br>Sha-la-la-la-la-la  
>Float along<br>Listen to the song  
>The song say kiss the girl<br>Sha-la-la-la-la-la  
>Music play<br>Do what the music say  
>You wanna kiss the girl<p>

Emmett shook his head. "Geez, that Eric really needs to grow some balls and just let his feelings out before he loses his chance with Ariel." He looked at me again. Does he ever- That's when it all clicked into place. There was a reason to this movie - more than the strange happenings in Emmett's mind. They were trying to get me to tell Bella that I love her. It's essentially manipulation, which I do not appreciate. I can't believe they would do this. I bet Alice put them up to it, that's got to be it. What if I don't want to right now? What if I want to wait for just the right moment? What if I'm just not ready?

What if they are right?

I know they are, I've just been denying it. I _should _tell her, I know it, before Jacob breaks her more. I do want to, desperately. There have been so many right moments and I have blown it, just like Eric did. I'm absolutely terrified by it, though. I sighed. But they are right. I have to tell Bella I love her before she turns back into a mermaid and I lose her forever. Before she moves on and I lose my chance of ever being with her. I have to do it. 

You've got to kiss the girl  
>Why don't you kiss the girl<br>You gotta kiss the girl  
>Go on and kiss the girl<p>

I have to.

I ran my fingers through my hair, my heart suddenly pounding a mile a minute. "Hey, guys, I'm sorry, but I'm going to go to bed. I'm a little tired and I have a lot on my mind right now." I stood up but didn't move.

"No worries," Emmett said, looking suspiciously innocent. "Did you like the movie?"

"Um, yeah. I guess. So, have fun."

"You too, bro. You too."

I practically ran up the stairs to my room and slammed the door behind me.

_**Immediately after… **_**EmPOV**

Jasper and I fist bumped and finished watching the movie

Mission accomplished.

* * *

><p><strong>Song notes:<strong> **Kiss the Girl is by Alan Menken and Howard Ashman**

**Told ya you'd be excited!**

**We're kinda slacking in our review department. I only have 7... All from the same person. (Love you bellacullen202!) I know for sure that there is more than one person reading this story. Where's the love? Don't make me be that person who waits to update until she has a certain amount of reviews, because I really don't want to be.**

**Anyhow…**

**Peace, love, and Twilight,**

**Katie**


	10. Goodbye

Hello friends!

So here's the deal… I have decided to stop this story. I'm really sorry but it's just not going where I had hoped it would. And, frankly, I have become bored with it. So, I'm sorry if you enjoyed it, but I'm not anymore. I have been writing a couple chapters ahead of you so I have another 3 I will upload. After that, though, I will no longer be updating this story. If you wanna know how it ends, PM me. I have all that figured out, I just really don't want to continue with it.

I will be starting a new story, though. Two actually. I will be writing them simultaneously but just posting one for right now. The one I will be posting is a montage of one-shots that follow love songs. I want to get into the other before I post it. Look out for them!

Well… I am sorry if I disappointed you, but it's what I gotta do. Sorry.

See you later.

Peace, love, and Twilight,

Katie


	11. If You Told Me To

**Voice font:** _Edward  
><em>**Album: Walls  
><strong>**Track #2: If You Told Me To**

**We are back to Bella POV, just so you know.**

If You Told Me To

_**Saturday, November 6...**_

I awoke to sunlight streaming through my window and birds chirping a happy song. It was one of those rare, wonderful sunny days in Forks. I smiled as I sat up and stretched, rubbing the sleep out of my eyes. I stared out at the blue sky for moment, feeling happier than I have in a while. I flung the covers off my legs and got out bed, then I walked over to the window. I opened it and stuck my head out, breathing in the fresh, morning air. It was warm, too. Again, strange for a November day in Forks. But, hey, I wasn't complaining.

I felt a small pang of hunger so I headed downstairs for a routinely breakfast of a hardy Poptart. I found Charlie sitting at the table eating burnt toast and coffee and reading the paper. He must have the day off.

"Good morning, dad," I greeted him as I dug in the pantry.

"Morning," he replied, then took a bite of his toast. He grimaced and set it down on his plate. "I really should have waited for you to come down before I got ambitious and decided I could make a decent breakfast."

I chuckled. "You know, toast is one of the simpler things in life." I put two strawberry Poptarts in the toaster and grabbed a plate from cupboard.

"That's what you think." I obviously got my cooking skills from mom.

The toaster popped, making me jump - like always. I put it on my plate and sat down across from Charlie. I had only gotten three bites in when my phone buzzed on the counter. If that was a certain someone, my happy mood would turn to an impressively sour one in a surprisingly quick amount of time. I was relieved to see the caller I.D. display a much more welcome number.

I flipped it open and said, "Good morning, Edward." Then I took another bite. I had amped the security on the 'Edward Situation' drawer and we were back to our normal, not awkward, close friendship.

"Good morning. Are you free today?" He asked me.

"Completely."

"Wonderful. Come over at four, I want to show you something". He sounded excited yet hesitant at the same time. I wondered what it could be that he had in mind.

"M'kay. See you then." I hung up and finished eating.

Around three, I ran upstairs to take a quick shower. I dried my hair and threw it up in a ponytail. Pulling open the doors of my closet, I stared at it's contents. I smiled to myself as I pictured Alice nagging me for poor appreciation of fashion. I grabbed the first pair of jeans my hand touched and a plaid button-up shirt. After I was dressed, I grabbed my bag and went downstairs, picking my keys up along the way.

"I'm going over to the Cullen's house, dad!" I yelled, then went out the door. I soaked in the sunshine as I walked over to my truck. You never know how long it will last.

_**Later…**_

The front door was unlocked so I just walked right in. This is what I usually do. I might as well be coming in and yelling "I'm home!" Emmett was again on the couch, playing a video game - racing this time - and winning I assume. He got a strange glint in his eyes when turned to smile at me. He usually has a glint in his eyes because he was Emmett, but today it was rather gloating with an I-know-something-you-don't-know feel to it.

"Hey, Bella! You here to see Eddie?"

"Yup." His smile matched his eyes when heard my response. Hopefully this wasn't some deranged scheme to embarrass me on new levels. I'm pretty sure it was Edward who called me, but we didn't talk very long, it may have been a trick. It's not unlikely with Emmett. "Is Edward here?" I asked skeptically.

Emmett laughed. "Sure is." He jabbed his thumb toward the back sliding glass door that nearly ran the entire length of the house. "He's been running in and out of that door all day doing God knows what." Funny. Usually when that line was said it was concerning _Emmett's_ questionable activities. "He left again about a half hour ago, should be back soon."

"Oh, okay."

He went back to his racing and I sat in the armchair and watched him race virtual cars that have a tendency to blow up. There are other things that have tendencies to blow up. Like peacefulness when a certain short member of this family enters a room.

"Bella!" Right now would be an example.

I jumped when her shrill, soprano shriek cut through the silence. Well, the silence behind the squeals and bangs of Emmett's game. "You're here!" She sounded genuinely surprised. Then she gave Emmett a look that was somewhere along the lines of amazed and approving. Emmett just looked smug.

"Uh, yeah. I am Edward called me and said to come over." She looked ecstatic. It was weird, even for a person who is very easily excitable. It's not like Santa is coming over for dinner, Edward just wants to show me something. Something that I still have no possible idea as to what it might be.

"Good! That's awesome, spectacular, fabulous, absolutely terrifically magnificent-"

"You runnin' out of adjectives yet?" Emmett asked sarcastically.

Alice rolled her eyes. That's when we heard the sound of the sliding glass door slide open and then shut. Her eyes widened and she a little dance thing that I didn't really know what to call. "Come on, Emmett, we are going over to Rosalie's and Jasper's!" She told him as she grabbed her coat.

"We are?"

"Yes. C'mon."

"When was that decided?"

She sighed exasperatedly. "Does it matter? Hurry up!"

"I'm coming, I'm coming." He turned his game off and joined Alice at the door.

As he shrugged his coat on Alice said, "You know, when Jasper and I get married it will be illegal for you and Rose to get married because you'll be in-laws."

"Not unless we do it at the same time."

Alice looked appalled. "There is absolutely no way I would ever share a wedding with you!"

Emmett guffawed as Edward came up behind me, he looked confused. "What are they talking about?" I shrugged.

"Yeah, you need that spotlight all for yourself. No way in hell would you share that." Then he shrugged. "How do you know Rose and I won't get married first?"

"Oh please," she drawled as she opened the door. "You don't have the guts to propose. You two are going to be just like this for another ten years." They continued back and forth with each other as they walked out.

To avoid an awkward silence between the two of us, now all by our selves, I said, "you know, she's right."

Edward rolled his eyes and laughed. "We'll cross that bridge when we get there."

"Like Alice will let it get in her way." Then I decided to change the subject. I usually don't like surprises, but with all of the unexpected emotions and facial expressions I was very anxious to find out what Edward has in store. "So," I said, turning to look at him with an excited smile and anticipating eyes. "What do you want to show me?"

His smile was more nervous looking than excited. He was doing a bad job of hiding it. "It's outside," he answered.

"What?"

"In the woods. It requires a little hike."

"In the woods?" I was a little less excited now.

Edward smirked and rolled his eyes. "Don't worry about your inability to walk on a stable surface without nearly breaking a bone," he teased me. I scowled at him which made his smile widen. "It's not vigorous at all. Promise. Now let's get going before we lose our light." I looked at the clock, it was nearing five o'clock. Oh good. We'll be doing this in semi darkness. Soon, total darkness. That makes me feel safe.

Edward led me to the door he came in through and went outside. The sky was still miraculously clear. It was tinted with the beginning pinks and oranges of the sunset. The air was still warm, too, at that point of almost needing a jacket. Edward led me to the edge of the forest in his backyard, maybe 20 yards from the house. There was a gap between two trees where a make-shift path was worn down from years use. The trees on either side of the path were lit up with white Christmas lights wrapped around them like candy canes. I stopped and stared at it, slightly bemused. Edward grinned and took my hand to pull me along through the trees and onto the path. There were more white lights on the trees lining it. It was darker in the woods so you could see them better. They were so pretty.

"Oh my word…" I murmured quietly as I admired Edwards handiwork. "Edward, this is amazing!"

He smiled that crooked smile that I love. "I try my best. And we needed a way to see the path going home."

There was no difficulty there. Every other tree on each side was twinkling with white, lighting up the entire path. "Well, mission accomplished," I told him, amazement still coloring my voice.

"I am nothing if not thorough."

I laughed, then squeezed his hand. That's when I realized I had never let go of it from when we entered the woods. I almost did then, but decided not to.

_**…**_

We continued walking in comfortable silence. I was still holding Edward's hand and in awe of the lights that never stopped glowing or dwindled in numbers. After a little bit we came across a railroad track.

"Has this always been here?" I asked him. I've never heard a train back near his house before.

"Yes, but it hasn't been use for quite some time," he explained. I could see that now. The wooden ties were dark with age and covered in moss. Rust spotted the steel rails. And of course, a single strand of white lights ran along the entire length of the rails, accompanying the lights on tree trunks.

"Edward, it's so beautiful."

He smiled and pulled me along behind him onto the train tracks. I looked ahead of us in bewilderment. The lights never stopped. And they continued that way as we walked hand-in-hand on the mossy railroad ties. It was about twenty minutes later when the lights stopped on the tracks and the tree lights turned to the left and into the woods.

"We are almost there," Edward told me as we started on the path. I didn't mind how long it took, though, I could look at this trail of lights for hours.

Soon, I could see the end of the twinkling trees where the path led to an opening. I couldn't see what was on the other side, but there was a beautiful glow coming from it. I wondered if there were even more lights there. I looked at Edward with excited anticipation. He returned a smile that was nervous looking again. How could he be nervous? Was he worried I wouldn't like what wanted to show me? If I was enchanted by just the journey to this place, how could I not be with the feature presentation?

"Wait," Edward stopped me just before I could see past the trees. "Close your eyes," he instructed. I did. The he grabbed both of my hands and slowly walked me forward. There was a huge smile on my face as I waited for to permission open them and see the surprise. I had butterflies in my stomach from excitement.

He stopped walking and dropped my hands to stand close behind me, I felt his hands on my shoulders. Then he whispered in my ear, "are you ready?" I shivered a little as I nodded. "Open your eyes."

As soon as I did, I gasped and my breath caught. We were in a circular meadow with tall green grass. A little stream was off to the side, creating background music of water calmly babbling over the rocks. The trees surrounding the meadow were also wrapped in white Christmas lights, creating the glow I saw. I looked up and saw the sunset in full swing, the sky was painted with deep reds and oranges and purples and blues. There were a few stars out already, bringing the dazzling lights on the trees into the sky. In the center, there was a checkered blanket laid out with picnic basket and pillows on it. More lights circled around the blanket, creating a sort spotlight.

"Edward, it's…" I breathed, not able to finds words to describe this sight. I turned to him with absolute wonder. "How…?"

He chuckled. "Thank the Lord for extension cords."

I walked slowly towards the blanket, still looking around and admiring all the sparkling lights. I stepped onto the blanket and saw a basket packed full. I turned around to look at Edward who was coming to join me. "You made dinner?"

"Well, of course! Do you not know me at all?" He teased. I smiled in response and sat down. Edward followed and sat next to me, our knees almost touching. "You know what the best part is?"

"Hmm?"

"None of this was Alice's idea. It's all me!"

I laughed at that. "I am very proud of you." I reached for the basket and peered inside. "So, what's for dinner?"

Edward grinned and pulled out two sandwiches wrapped in tinfoil. "I have prepared for us a delicacy of gourmet ham sandwiches with various fillings picked fresh from the Garden de Esme. A side of cheese and crackers. And for dessert, chocolate covered strawberries."

Smiling, I grabbed one of the sandwiches and unwrapped it. "Fit for a king!" I giggled.

Edward grinned his lopsided grin. "Only the best." He took a sandwich and removed the tinfoil. "Besides," he said, rolling the foil into a ball. "Esme would be ashamed if I presented anything less."

"Well, I don't know. The lettuce is a little soggy, and these crackers seem stale." I gasped dramatically. "Good God! Is that a spot on the blanket? I may have to send a complaint to her," I said in mock sternness, teasing him. Edward just rolled his eyes and threw the tinfoil ball at me.

Dinner was very good, best ham sandwich I have ever eaten. We talked and laughed while we ate under the white lights. The stars were out now, a sea of sparkles in the sky. We pushed the food aside and laid on our backs with the pillows among us and gazed at the stars, our shoulders touching. Edward pointed out constellations and I made some up. I was very good at it, ignoring Edward's skeptical eyebrow raising and chuckles.

"Okay, straight up from that tallest pine tree. It's a hippo eating a pie. With a squirrel." The pie may have been a hamburger, but the specifics don't really matter.

Edward laughed. "Actually, your squirrel is the little dipper. And it's definitely an elephant."

I laughed with him and tucked my head into the space between his shoulder and neck, it was quite comfortable. He sighed then, it was quite and sounded a little uneasy. I looked up at his face. His eyebrows were all scrunched up and his forehead was creased. His lips were pursed and in a small frown. That nervous look in eyes was back.

"What?" I asked.

"Just thinking."

"Mmm." I paused. "'Bout what?" I propped my head up on my hand, my elbow supporting my hand.

"Life," he replied.

I waited for an elaboration, but none came. I sighed and frowned. "That's awfully vague."

He just looked at me and shrugged with a little half, smile on his face. After a moment, he sat up and stared at the sky, then looked at me, and then at the ground. Then he repeated the cycle, looking at me a little longer this time. He murmured something that sounded like "it's now or never."

I sat up and looked at him questioningly. "Are you okay, Edward?"

He snapped out of his little trance. "Uh, yeah. Sorry. I was just…"

"Thinking?" I supplied.

He chuckled lightly. "Yes, I suppose." He pursed his lips and then let out a shaky puff of air. The nervousness painted his face again, but it was more hidden this time. "So, um, I did actually bring you here for a reason. I thought I should probably do it before the day was over."

"Okay, go for it."

He reached over the edge of the blanket and brought back an acoustic guitar. He bashfully glanced at me out of the corner of his eyes. "I wrote a song, thought I'd play it for you."

That's what he's been so tense about? He has written songs before, all very good. Many of them we performed. He's never acted like this before. My eyebrows creased together in confusion, waiting for him to continue.

"So, um, here it goes…"

He began with a simple intro on his guitar. When he started singing, it was soft and gentle, not slow, but not fast.

_Well I've been searching for something true  
>My heart says it must be you<br>I'd love to fall and see it through  
>But only if you told me to<em>

He picked it up just a bit here, still keeping it on the softer side. He looked at me while he sang, almost intensely. I could still see the uncertainty in his face, though.

_Well I'd run though the desert, I'd walk threw the rain  
>Get you into trouble, and take all the blame<br>I'd paint you a picture, write you a song  
>And I'd do it all over if I did it all wrong<em>

I don't know why he was so anxious about this. It was very good, both lyrics and music. And I love his voice. It's like velvet, smooth and beautiful, I could listen to it all day. I smiled as I listened to him, he returned a small one. 

I don't wanna steal you away  
>Or make you change the things that you believe<br>I just wanna drink from the words you say

_And be everything you need  
>Yeah I could be so good at loving you<br>But only if you told me to_

He still didn't brake his gaze he had on my eyes. He seemed to be getting stronger, less nervous, as he sang each line. I wondered where he got the idea from. I know all songs have to come from somewhere. It's pretty obvious what that inspiration is for me. But what is going in Edward's pretty head?

_I've seen a lot of good love go to waste  
>And I don't wanna look back on these days<br>Knowing all the things you'd never know  
>If I never said a word and let you go<em>

I don't wanna steal you away  
>Or make you change the things that you believe<br>I just wanna drink from the words you say  
>And be everything you need<br>Yeah I could be so good at loving you  
>But only if you told me to<p>

That's when it all clicked into place. The nervousness, the eye-lock, the elaborate decorating. He wasn't just singing this song he wrote. He was singing _to _me_. For_ me. _About_ me. I froze in shock and couldn't look away from his face. It was another one of those moments where I could feel the energy passing between us, that connection. He kept singing.

I don't wanna steal you away  
>Or make you change the things that you believe<br>I just wanna drink from the words you say  
>And be everything you need<br>Yeah I could be so good at loving you  
>But only if you told me to<p>

My heart was beating like a stampeding horse, my breath was uneven, and an entire circus of acrobats was performing in my stomach. I should have been absolutely terrified. I was, actually, but the smile grew on my face anyway.

Maybe this is something I'll never be  
>But I'll be right here till you tell me<p>

I don't know when the song ended or how long ago it was. All I could do was stare at Edward. I couldn't move, couldn't look away, I could barely breath. The only thing that was going through my mind was how much I wanted to kiss him.

So then I did something totally unexpected. Something crazy, something insane, something terrifying. Something I never saw myself doing in a hundred years.

I kissed him.

All but jumping on him, I nearly knocked him over as I threw my arms around his neck. He didn't move. probably out of shock, this is very out of character for me. Then I pulled back, frightened that I had misinterpreted the song. What if it wasn't about what I thought it was about? What if it was just some lyrics he'd pulled out of his head from some other source of inspiration? What if it was about someone else? What if I had just ruined a friendship that I've had since preschool? I carefully regarded him, anticipating an expression of pure horror and astonishment. For a fleeting moment I considered making a run for it, skipping town and heading for Canada. But when the big, lopsided smile appeared on his face, all of those worries melted away.

He cupped my face and gently brought my lips back to his. This kiss was slow and tender. Our lips moved together in perfect harmony. His were warm and soft and velvety, just like his voice. I wrapped my arms back around his neck, pulling myself closer to him. His hands slid down over my shoulders and down to my waist. A shiver ran up my spine. I knotted my fingers in his silky, bronze hair, loving the feeling of it. Loving the feeling of everything. His lips against mine, his hands dancing on my back and face, our bodies close together, the spark jumping between us.

Then he whispered against my lips, "I love you, Bella."

I froze. He froze. A drop of rain fell on my head.

I tore my hands from around his neck and backed away from him. _I love you_. Those three little words - only three - sent my head spinning, my heart racing, my breath catching. They terrified me, in a different way they usually terrify a person.

"Bella…"

I gasped at Edward's voice and looked at him in shock. Did that really just happen? Did I really just kiss him? No. No, I can't. I can't do this. I just can't. I felt more drops of rain.

"Bella, just pretend I never said that. Pretend that never happened." He reached his hand out towards me, but I flinched away from it. Quickly, the rain came at a steady fall. The beautiful stars were replaced by black clouds.

I jumped up in a panic. "I, um…" I looked behind me to where the trees parted, lights following the path. "I have to go." My voice was shaking as I said it. My entire body was shaking. I turned around with out a glance at Edward and hurriedly walked to the path, trying to stay somewhat calm. That may be a lost cause by now, though.

"Bella," he pleaded. I walked quicker, stumbling. "Bella!" Faster. "Bella, wait!" I was running now.

I stopped when I got to the path, my breathing heavy and uneven. I glanced behind me quickly. Edward had followed me half way, he was standing in the middle of the tall grass, soaked and with a look of agony on his face.

"I'm sorry!" He yelled. I kept running. "Bella! Bella, I'm sorry!" A tear slid down my cheek.

When I ran onto the path, it was pouring rain.

* * *

><p><strong>Song notes: If You Told Me To is by Hunter Hayes<strong>

**Well, shoot. Got your hopes up and then killed 'em.**

**Two more chapters till I pull the plug.**

**Peace, love, and Twilight,  
><strong>**Katie**


	12. Because of You

**Voice font:** _Bella_

**Album: Walls**

**Track #3: Because of You**

Because of You

_Run. Run. Run._

I didn't stop running as I followed the path through the woods. I was grateful for the lights now, instead of in awe of them. If they weren't there to guide the way back to my truck, I would have gotten lost in the dark woods and eaten by a mountain lion. The lights all bled together from the tears. I could no longer tell if it was tears streaming down my face or the rain. I wasn't quite sobbing, but it was enough to make my chest hurt and my head ache.

But that pain didn't compare to the stabbing in my heart. I was being torn up inside. The image of Edward standing in the middle of the meadow, staring after me as I ran away, a look of pure agony on his face. It was so hard to do that to Edward, so hard to hurt him like that. He just told me that loved me. _Loved me!_ And I ran away. I ran away from him. I had been paralyzed by fear in that moment. And then I panicked. After what I have been through in past month, it was just too much.

I suppose I've always known that this would happen. Not Edward professing his love for me, defiantly not that. But being scared of love, not being able to return it. Not just not feeling that way about the guy, but not being able to love with the wound in my heart from Jacob. I could always see it coming. Ever since the boys of Forks High came after me with charming smiles. Ever since I saw Jacob in that bar…

Finally, I was able to see the house. There was only one light on in the back of the house coming from Alice's room. I sped up as I neared my truck. Then I pulled the door open and flung myself in, drenched and shivering. I started the car and turned the heat up all the way - which was an unimpressive 72 degrees. The clock read 11:13. We were there for such a long time. It was a beautiful time, though. Probably described as _perfect_ by most people. And it was… until the end. When I ruined it. When Jacob ruined it.

This was all Jacob's fault. All of this chaos, all of this anger, and these tears, and heartbreaks. And with more innocent girls than just me. I know they say it takes two to break a relationship, but there are better ways to go about it.

I was soon nearing my driveway. I was craving a hot, steamy shower to wash the tears away. But when it came time to turn, I didn't. I kept driving. No matter how much I wanted to go put my sweat pants on and curl up in a ball on my bead, I just couldn't. I kept driving.

There was somewhere else I needed to be.

_**Later…**_

Picture a crystal vase in your hand. It's made of sparkling, perfectly clear glass. Then it falls, falls right out of your hand. It hit's the hard ground with a shriek. The glass breaks into thousands of pieces, scattering all over the floor. Your beautiful vase! It fell and now it's broken, broken into tiny pieces, you cannot even decipher what it use to be. How will you ever fix it? That's the horrible thing about it. When you break glass, you can never completely fix it. There is always going to be holes, whether they are big or small. You can't find every piece of glass and glue and it all together to make it what it was. It will never be totally complete again, never the entire whole. Forever missing a piece of itself.

This is what Jacob did to me. He ripped my heart out and shattered it into angry and miserable little pieces. He took a piece of me away with him when he lied to me. That part of me will never heal to what it was. I will never be able to _truly_ love a man with my entire being again. There will always be that question in my mind, always wondering if he really loves you. It's like a whole in my heart. Bella, forever broken.

So now I was standing in the middle of the empty road outside Jacob's house. The rain was still coming down steady, making pools in the old, uneven pavement. I just stared at the house. There were no lights on. They might not be home, but that didn't matter.

Emotions were churning inside of me. All jumbling together in a confusing mess, almost making me numb. But not enough to the point where I couldn't feel the stabbing pain in my heart. The tears had stopped flowing, eventually. Maybe I had run out. For so long I had tried to keep the heart break buried, let out only the fury. I know I said time and time again that I wasn't going to be a hormonal teenage girl going through her first serious heart break, crying in her bedroom. But, hey, we all needed to at some point. And I was heart broken.

I kept staring at Jacob's house, trying to think, trying to understand why he had lied to me. But this wasn't just about him lying anymore. It was deeper than that now. It probably ruined the best relationship I've had. Ruined me.

And it was his fault.

_I will not make the same mistakes that you did  
>I will not let myself<em>  
><em>Cause my heart so much misery<br>I will not break the way you did,  
>You fell so hard<br>I've learned the hard way  
>To never let it get that far<em>

_Because of you_  
><em>I never stray too far from the sidewalk<em>  
><em>Because of you<em>  
><em>I learned to play on the safe side so I don't get hurt<em>  
><em>Because of you<em>  
><em>I find it hard to trust not only me, but everyone around me<em>  
><em>Because of you<em>  
><em>I am afraid<em>

_I lose my way_  
><em>And it's not too long before you point it out<em>  
><em>I cannot cry<em>  
><em>Because I know that's weakness in your eyes<em>  
><em>I'm forced to fake<em>  
><em>A smile, a laugh everyday of my life<em>  
><em>My heart can't possibly break<em>  
><em>When it wasn't even whole to start with<em>

_Because of you_  
><em>I never stray too far from the sidewalk<em>  
><em>Because of you<em>  
><em>I learned to play on the safe side so I don't get hurt<em>  
><em>Because of you<em>  
><em>I find it hard to trust not only me, but everyone around me<em>  
><em>Because of you<em>  
><em>I am afraid<em>

_I watched you die  
>I heard you cry every night in your sleep<br>I was so young  
>You should have known better than to lean on me<br>You never thought of anyone else  
>You just saw your pain<br>And now I cry in the middle of the night  
>For the same damn thing<em>

I all but screaming now. The tears streaming down face again. All the raw pain and misery and anguish that I kept buried inside of me exploded. I fell to my knees, scrapping them on the rough road. I knotted my hands in my hair dug them into the gravel and dirt, scrapping them up as well. It felt good though. I have never been more furious at Jacob. Screaming, basically in hysterics, felt good.

_Because of you_  
><em>I never stray too far from the sidewalk<em>  
><em>Because of you<em>  
><em>I learned to play on the safe side so I don't get hurt<em>  
><em>Because of you<em>  
><em>I try my hardest just to forget everything<em>  
><em>Because of you<em>  
><em>I don't know how to let anyone else in<em>  
><em>Because of you<em>  
><em>I'm ashamed of my life because it's empty<em>  
><em>Because of you<em>  
><em>I am afraid<em>

My throat hurt from screaming and my head throbbed from sobbing and my heart hurt from everything.

_Because of you_

A light turned on in the living room, shining through the closed curtains. A large shadow of a man walked in front of it.

_Because of you _

* * *

><p><strong>Song notes: Because of You is by Kelly Clarkson<strong>

**Ya, I know. Short chapter. But that's just how this one is.**

**It's not the best song for this because it's about abuse, but you get the message. At least I hope you do… I thought of this song for the chapter and couldn't think of anything else. Oh, well. I like it.**

**Just one more…**

**Peace, love, Twilight,  
><strong>**Katie **


	13. Unapologize

**Voice font: **_Bella_ … **Edward**

**Album: Walls**

**Track #4: Unapologize**

**Track #5: Little by Little**

Unapologize

_**November 9...**_

Okay, I'll admit it. I've sorta kinda been avoiding Edward. I have good reasons, though! How would you like to have a conversation with the guy who professed his love to you but you ran away screaming? (Well, I guess the screaming came later, but you get what I mean.) However, avoiding a person is a bit difficult to do when you ride to school with the guy every day and can't think of an excuse to tell his sister why you aren't there today, and sit next to him in class, and eat lunch at the same table, etcetera, etcetera. Basically, school is not helping the issue.

I carried my lunch tray over to the table we were sitting at. I slid into the chair that was next to Jasper, two away from Edward. That way, I could still not be by him and not have to avoid eye contact with him if we were sitting directly across from each other. Yeah, that'll work.

Alice smiled at me as I sat down. "Hi, Bella! How have you been?"

"Uh, pretty good," I lied. I've actually been a complete mess, but I'm sure you know that.

"Mmm, that's good." She glanced at Edward who was concentrating on peeling his dry broccoli apart.

There was a bit of an awkward silence between us all. Do they know? Was Alice spying on us the entire time? It's not unlikely.

"So," Alice broke the silence. "I was thinking about taking a trip to mall tomo-"

"Shh!" Rosalie slapped a hand over Alice's mouth. "Don't distract me!" She had her head buried in her notes and history book. "I have a test next period and don't know anything! The teacher can't teach for his life."

"Protest," Emmett suggested. "Turn in a blank paper and start your hair on fire. Ultimate protest."

Rosalie looked at him like he was crazy - which he was - and Jasper said, "What?"

"That's just what I would do."

"Of course you would, Emmett," Alice said.

Edward sat there in silence as they talked about things to talk about. He had moved on to crumbling his bread, his face still deep in concentration. The bell rang and everyone got up to go to class. I had a free period now so I stayed at the table a bit longer. Unfortunately, Edward did too. We usually went to study in the library or outside together, it usually ended up with us just goofing off and having fun.

For about three seconds, we both didn't move, a little unsure of what to do. I couldn't stand it, so I shoved my chair back and grabbed my things. Then I quickly headed for the doors that led out to the patio in the back of the school where we could hang out or eat lunch when it was nice. It was drizzling today, but I didn't mind. I was just glad to not be in the same building as Edward anymore.

Umbrellas were covering a few of the tables. I went to one that was tucked away behind some trees and plants. I sat on top of the table where it was dry and leaned against the pole. Then I dug out my book from my bag. When I saw the cover, I frowned. Romeo and Juliet. _Way_ too much romance ending in tragedy, exactly what I don't need right now. I'm pretty sure I have another somewhere in here… Wuthering Heights. Shoot. Well, I guess I have homework.

"I know you have been avoiding me."

I gasped and jerked in surprised. It was Edward. I didn't respond and went back to my math. Maybe if I ignore him he will just go away.

"Bella. C'mon. We have to talk."

I sighed. Without looking at him, I said, "I have homework to do."

"Bella, this can't wait. I need to-"

"Edward, I can't. It's just too much for me to deal with right now." I looked at him with pain in my eyes. He looked about the same. "Let's just… let's just forget it ever happened. Pretend last night never happened."

"No, Bella. I won't do that. I just can't. I have put it off too long and can't handle it anymore. I'm in love with you, Bella. That's how I feel. I won't deny it." I flinched at the word _love_. He said this very strong and passionately.

I let out a shaky breath. "Edward, please. I can't do this right now." I got off the table a slung my bag over my shoulder. I tried to walk away but he grabbed my shoulder and turned me around. I felt a jolt when he touched me and jumped away. He just stepped closer to me, I kept my head tilted away from him.

"Bella, please just listen to me. Do with it what you want, but please just listen." I didn't respond.

**Last night, I was pouring out my heart  
>Like a waterfall to you<br>And with one kiss, I was a runaway train  
>Flying off the track to you<br>"I love you" came flooding out  
>Couldn't make it stop, couldn't shut my mouth<br>I felt like a fool when I lied and said I was sorry  
>But<strong>

**I unapologize, I meant every word**  
><strong>Won't take back the way I feel about you<strong>  
><strong>I can't unsay what you heard, 'cause you heard me right<strong>  
><strong>And I won't try to fight them back<strong>  
><strong>Or hide my feelings for you<strong>  
><strong>I unapologize<strong>

**You know, people say a lot of things**  
><strong>That they don't really mean<strong>  
><strong>And last night, I told a little white lie<strong>  
><strong>Hoping you'd forget the scene<strong>  
><strong>Where it felt like a movie under the porch light<strong>  
><strong>Couldn't help myself when you held me tight<strong>  
><strong>Said what I meant, then I lied and said I was sorry<strong>

**I unapologize, I meant every word**  
><strong><em>Won't take back the way I feel about you<em>**  
><strong><em>I can't unsay what you heard, 'cause you heard me right<em>**  
><strong><em>And I won't try to fight them back<em>**  
><strong><em>Or hide my feelings for you<em>**  
><strong><em>I unapologize<em>**

**Oh there's no time to be**  
><strong>Holding it all and trying to pretend<strong>  
><strong>That I don't feel anything<strong>  
><strong>Oh, I shouldn't have said I'm sorry<strong>

**I meant every word**  
><strong>Won't take back the way I feel about you<strong>  
><strong>I can't unsay what you heard, 'cause you heard me right<strong>  
><strong>And I won't try to fight them back<strong>  
><strong>Or hide my feelings for you<strong>  
><strong>I unapologize<strong>

**'Cause you heard me right, yeah**

**I unapologize**

The tears were sliding down my cheeks as his voice faded away. It hurt so much to have to say no to him. But I wasn't ready, I couldn't love anyone with a broken heart.

"Bella," he said softly, "don't cry." Edward lifted his hand to cup my cheek. I flinched but didn't retreat. He wiped a tear away with his thumb and kept his hand there. I lifted mine and curled my fingers around his to pull his hand away. I didn't let go, though, and neither did he. He brought my clutched fingers up to his lips and kissed them tenderly. This time I did retreat.

"I can't do this. I'm just… I'm broken here, Edward. I need time to put myself back together again before I can even think about loving anyone." I frowned at the sadness in his eyes. "It's still to fresh. Just give me some time."

Edward only nodded in response, his face twisted in pain of rejection. After a moment, it softened. Then he finally spoke. "I understand, Bella. But I'm still not sorry."

**Friday, November 12...**

Have you ever read a story where there is a villain and a victim? Where you think this villain is as bad as a soul can get and you feel bad for the poor victim? Then there is a sudden change of events and things are revealed - life altering things? Then the villain is just a guy who lead up to this? Then the victim is the horribly evil villain?

That's my life right now.

I never thought this would happen to me. That I would be the one to cause the pain, making life miserable. But here I am, basically ruining Edward's life. I just wasn't ready. I was still broken. How could a broken heart ever love someone? I would just end up breaking _his_ heart.

Like I'm doing right now…

I just need to put myself back together. I need to pick up the pieces and make them whole again - or at least as whole as it can be. All I needed was time. Some time heal and maybe a little Neosporin to jumpstart the process.

_**Saturday, November 13...**_

The Big Band Truck pulled into the driveway at 5:30. I was a bit nervous to get in and commence with the nights activities. I ran to the truck with my head down to avoid any potential eye contact through backseat windows. This time, I got in on the opposite side, sitting with Alice in between me and Edward instead of me in the middle. They said their polite hellos which was promptly followed by an awkward silence. The tension was thick in the air. Alice fidgeted with her dress hem, I chewed on my nails and Edward stared out the window with that look of concentration. Emmett tried to make jokes and ask inappropriate questions, but it just made things more weird than better today. I was counting on Alice's ability to move her jaw and babble at breakneck speeds, but she was wearing the same look of concentration as Edward.

I sighed in relief when we pulled up to the Hale's driveway. Rosalie was talking before she even opened the door. Things were a little more normal then, Rosalie broke Alice out of her trance and started talking about clothes and gossip and Emmett made jokes and asked inappropriate questions, music was playing and Jasper and Alice were making goo-goo eyes at each other. But there was still a certain strain in it all. There was still something off.

I can tell you exactly what that something is, though. Edward and I weren't rolling our eyes about jokes and inappropriate questions together. We were weren't making hushed, sarcastic remarks about fashion and gossip. We weren't secretly listening to Debussy on Edward's iPod with shared ear buds. We weren't silently teasing goo-goo eyes with each other. Instead, we were sitting on opposite ends of the truck, avoiding each other.

Tonight we were doing a song we did a while. That right there immediately tipped everyone off that something wasn't wrong. (If they didn't get that from the awkward car ride or other awkward silences from the past few days.) The only time we ever repeated songs was if something was wrong. So… there you go. That pretty much sums it up.

Emmett drove into the Carnival ride parking lot and pulled into a spot near the backstage door. It was raining today so we hauled our stuff into the dressing room. Alice and Rosalie promptly set up shop and it soon looked like we were backstage at Broadway. Alice put me in her beauty chair of death in front of the makeup table to do my hair and makeup. I brought my music for tonight with me to look it over again. It wasn't the song I was singing with everyone so I tried to keep it as hidden as possible. But I could see Alice's sneaky eyes peering over my shoulder.

"So…," she said as she plugged in the curling iron.

"So," I replied. Alice pilled half of my hair on top of my head and secured it with a large clip.

"I like the music choice tonight." It wasn't about love and it wasn't about Jacob. I wrote a while before things went south. Seemed like a safe one.

"Yup." I was hoping I would be able to stick with one syllable answers.

"Is there… anything you want to talk about?" Alice picked up the curler and wrapped a piece of hair around it.

"Nope." So far so good.

"You sure?" Another section of hair went around the curling iron.

"Yup."

"Okay, just let me know if there is. You know I will listen."

I sat there in silence then while finished my hair and makeup and hummed what sounded like Kiss the Girl.

_**Later…**_

Our performance went great. At least think it went great. No one booed us. I could tell that everyone was just bit off. Not musically off, just energy wise. Even Emmett wasn't all there. He wasn't jumping around as much as he usually does. Jasper's hair wasn't flying all over the place as his head moved with his drumsticks. Alice and Rosalie weren't dancing with microphone stands. Edward actually _sat_ at his piano and still looked like he was concentrating. I was trying to look happy and hoping that it didn't just look fake. But like I said, we didn't get booed. I really had to fix this, which made more set on doing my surprise solo tonight.

After that, I convinced Alice and Rose to let me stay back stage for a little bit to cool off. When they were all out, I took my make up off, un-fancied my hair and put something a little less flashy on. Then I just sat and freaked out for a little bit, praying to God that I wouldn't kill Edward anymore than I already have. About ten minutes later, it was time for me to get back on stage.

All I had was a stool, a guitar and a microphone. I wanted to keep it simple. As I came out and sat down I didn't give any intro or search out the confused and shocked faces of the Cullens and Hales. I just started singing what I hoped would help our current situation.

_Rome wasn't built in a day  
>It didn't happen overnight<br>The stars didn't get to shine that way  
>Just by turnin' on the lights<br>And I'm not any different  
>God knows I'm not<em>

_Yeah I just need a little more time_  
><em>To pick up the pieces<em>  
><em>So I can put it back together baby<em>  
><em>It could take forever but I will, I will<em>  
><em>Little by little<em>  
><em>Little by little<em>

_It's best for you to walk away_  
><em>I can't look you in the eye<em>  
><em>Cause I can't be the woman<em>  
><em>That you need be to be tonight<em>  
><em>I wish it was that simple<em>  
><em>But God knows it's not<em>

_Yeah I just need a little more time_  
><em>To pick up the pieces<em>  
><em>So I can put it back together baby<br>__It could take forever but I will, I will_

_Little by little, brick by brick_  
><em>Little by little, bit by bit<em>  
><em>I'm getting better the closer I get<em>  
><em>Little by little by little<em>

_Yeah I just need a little more time_  
><em>To pick up the pieces<em>  
><em>So I can put it back together baby<em>  
><em>It could take forever but I will, I will<em>  
><em>Little by little<em>  
><em>Little by little<em>

_Little by little_  
><em>Little by little<em>  
><em>I'll get there little by little by little<em>

As I walked off the stage, I caught Edward's eyes. He looked sad but understanding. I thought this would have made me feel better, but it didn't. Then I wondered if I ever would feel better.

* * *

><p><strong>Song notes: Unapologize is by Carrie Underwood, Little By Little is by Whitney Duncan<strong>

**Fun fact: According to Microsoft Works, unapologize is only a word when it's capitalized. True story.**

**So… that's it. Sorry to leave you guys on a sad note. If you wanna know how the rest goes tell me and PM you. **

**Well, hope you liked what I was able to give. I may or may not take it down. Still deciding on that. **

**Hey! Happy stuff! I will have a new story out soon. Watch for it, author alert or whatever it is you do. **

**Anyhoo…**

**Peace, love, and Twilight,**

**Katie**


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